Increasingly Cynical?

[Wade]

I think this site is making me slightly cynical. Maybe cynical's not the right word... maybe I'm just less patient, or worse, less empathetic.

It usually has to do with new time posters. I'm all for new folk to sign up and contribute, I think that's great! The more the merrier. But there seems to be, more so lately than ever before, an influx of new posters who sign up to gather feedback for a specific problem they're having.... and then they split. And I find myself caring less and less when I read these "flash in the pan" posts. I have thoughts like "Oh for fuck's sake, just ask him out already, what's the big deal?" or "Yes... I'm sure you'll find somebody" or "I'm sure your penis is just fine, get over yourself."

Perhaps I feel that way because I find myself becoming less concerned with the small things in my own life, so I feel like others should be at that point too... even though I know that's ridiculous.

I guess this site has really taught me that my own issues are so very painfully unoriginal.... It's amazing to see so many different posters with such similar dilemmas. And I'm not even one of the veterans of this site. I would love to hear from some of the long time members how you find the patience to answer the same questions over and over again.

Thanks for reading.

[LJay]

You have been here longer than I have, Wade, but I think you have a good point. My theory is that some of these short lived posters are the same person who is trying to punch a few drama buttons. Such a person -- or persons -- gets off on twiddling with the juicy little problems and could care less about really dealing with them.

It is true that many problems are common to us all and one good thing about this and other sites is that we can feel less alone about ti. Of course, one can get a bit cynical but in the long run many do mellow.

I grow tired with the crew you refer to, but there are good guys around, too. They help me though the day.

[Iceblink]

I do think most are people just looking for advice, but there are many others that fall into two categories. One, the problem is so mundane and barely a problem at all with an answer so obvious I wonder how they were even able to manage making toast this morning. Then on the other side, the issue is so outlandish and over-the-top that I find it hard to believe it is a genuine post and more likely a person laughing his ass off at the responses and the attention the thread is getting and you often never hear from the person again. It is not just here. It happens on most forum sites. I try to avoid the ones I'm questing as fake, but sometimes I do fall into the fray and comment anyway.

Off topic, but one thing I find funny that new people do on forum sites is to dig up old threads and instead of just making some general comment, instead directly question the OP who has now deleted himself or had the problem a while ago. If someone made a thread two months ago asking what to wear to an interview, he is probably long past the point of still needing that advice.

[Virge]

[COLOR="Red"]Wade ~~
[SIZE="5"]don't become cynical...please.
I need your snarky ass comments to give me something
funny to think about when I'm taking my 4:30 am dump[/SIZE].
[SIZE="7"]Your humor is five times more effective
at masking the odor of fresh fecal matter
than Febreze!!!!![/SIZE][/COLOR]

[SIZE="5"][COLOR="Red"]And back on Topic...........

I'm about at my limit for patience with the sackface drama plague. I'm noticing something in the way I reply to them.

#1. I wait for others to have an opportunity to jump in first and tell the sackfaces what is always the OBVIOUS answer to us all in these things. If they dont by 10 to 15 answers I'm getting stuck with the job of being the asshole who has to knock down a sackface and give him a warm reality enema.

#2. I jump in as fast as I can to point out the obvious and try to move on and hope someone grabs it and runs.

Most of the time it's the same basic BS under everyone of the sack face posts... "please tell me something I want to hear and not what I'm trying to pretend isn't the truth."

For all we know it could be be just one single troll playing all the sackfaces. And when you go back and look at ALLLL their posts in the past five months there might be TWO that really deserved to be anonymous....
No. Make that THREE.
Whoever did that anonymous thread about
confidential rectal exams every Wednesday
is a comic genius.

It hasn't been a long time since I was ready to lead a mutiny to lynch all the sackfaces.
I was talked out of it by *several*people*of*which*more*than*half*have*committed*seppuku*

(or self deleted.)

[/COLOR][/SIZE]

[East]

The thing that gets me is when strangers take time out of their day to give someone advice and the person doesn't have the courtesy to even go back and respond or thank the people who have attempted to help them....and THEN they come back and ask the same question again!

It would also be nice if the people contribute to other conversations...or try to pay it forward to someone else who has a question....

OK..I am going to edit now and add something that I erased.....I feel like an asshole for saying it because I want them to get help but I am happy that the parade of suicide threads 3-4 years ago that used to populate these pages are now gone.

[Virge]

The thing that gets me is when strangers take time out of their day to give someone advice and the person doesn't have the courtesy to even go back and respond or thank the people who have attempted to help them....and THEN they come back and ask the same question again!

It would also be nice if the people contribute to other conversations...or try to pay it forward to someone else who has a question....

I had to virgilize that last line East. One thanks wasn't enough for that.

We have great examples of guys paying it forward and I'm really proud of them and the way they are stepping in to give advice even though THEY ARE KIDS!!! BlueStar -- VerySimple -- SHOman is catching up in a hurry. Just watch and read them!!!!!!

Seeing them and dealing with one shot sackfaces is demoralizing and it's being abused by people with BS problems that don't even warrant being posted anonymously.

[Mark]

So I've been on here for 7 years now and have seen the same questions over and over again.. the way I've dealt with it is by disappearing for a bit and then coming back and repeating this process over and over. Again this isn't for everyone, but it does fit quite well with my life giving me time for work.

I don't really comment on every thread, or I'll go through stages. I do think sometimes its rude for me not to participate in the whole welcome to the site, but lately it seems like thats all I'd spend my time doing! Theres quite a few on here posting now quite regularly I've never even spoken to.

I think I'm going off point anyway. Just redirect people to posts if the questions are identical - or just stand back and let someone else deal with it

[CellarDweller]

I have thoughts like "Oh for fuck's sake, just ask him out already, what's the big deal?" or "Yes... I'm sure you'll find somebody" or "I'm sure your penis is just fine, get over yourself."

LOL! Nice to know I'm not the only one!!

[CellarDweller]

*resists the urge/temptation to go start an anonymous thread about how to deal with having a small penis and being a virgin*

LOL

[BlueStar]

*resists the urge/temptation to go start an anonymous thread about how to deal with having a small penis and being a virgin*

LOL

Now let me speak my part...

I'm sorry there are so much (too much) pessimistic new people who seek GS every day, for the silliest situations and advice, and being present here 10 minutes if not less. This is the exact time they take to create their long, non-punctuated, badly spelled and written complaints about barely anything that makes sense. I, too, wonder if they even come back to read what's taken members on GS who truly care time and effort to help these poor ashamed help-seekers. It gets really on my cold nerves...

However I deeply thank those who, like me, always remember to post good stuff. Because GS is a family, and a family isn't just meant for drama and endless issues without sharing some happy moments. Therefore I stopped giving advice to those temporary newbies because I hate the fact that our fellow members are costing their precious time to provide help and support to those who don't even care about introducing themselves, before annoying us with their pitiful dramasturbation (I stole this word, sorry :tongue.