25 and just starting on the gay scene

[Blueeyedwonder]

Hey there,

I am 25 and I have known I was gay for years and have been out. However, I've been very busy with studies and have moved around quite a lot so have not made many friends in the different places I've moved to/worked.

I have been clubbing and have had a small group of friends and I really do enjoy the scene. However, now I am more settled and in a position to focus on making more friends here I would like to get into the scene a lot more.

However, what do you say to people who say 25 is getting old for the clubbing scene? Lots of people say that gay clubs are mainly for 18-23 year olds etc and I just feel like I've wasted a few years of my life moving around, focusing on different paths of my career.

I know 25 is not old but do you honestly believe I have outgrown the gay clubbing scene.

[Double007]

Hey there!

Good for you for getting out there! First of all, you aren't too old to go clubbing. Personally, I hot my first gay club at 34. The particular club I go to has two main nights, one were most of the 18-23 year olds go and a 21 and up night. WHen I go to the 21 and up night there are a ton people in their upper 20's, 30's and even 40's. I really enjoy the club scene, but not every week. You are never to young. From someone who spent over 13 years building a career and not giving much time to social life, It's never too late to live it up.

On the topic of making friends, don't just rely on the clubbing scene to make friends. I have found that to not be the best place. Look for other ways to meet people, like gay hiking groups or gay professionals organizations. Where I am there are some volleyball leagues. You are bound to meet people who have common interests and become friends with them.

You have not waisted your time. You have spent time doing what you want to do and creating a better you, going to school and getting a good job, which makes you appealing to people.

[Cuddly]

Are you really that different from when you were 23? Or 21?
I know I'm not, but I've never been into clubbing. I don't think there's such a thing as being too old for the scene, though. The party-hard 21 year olds might disagree with me, but they probably think anybody above 30 might drop dead any second.

[Borg69]

I have friends from 40's to 60's who still religiously go out every weekend. Some people love it, some outgrow it. Some never cared for it. But if you're dealing with bitchy queens who think 25 is too old, I guess the catty pretentious attitudes I remember haven't changed any from my clubbing days.

[palbert]

If 25 is "too old" you're going to the wrong club or on the wrong night. Avoid the disco queens or cha-cha crowd.

At 25 you're just a puppy.

[Bowyn Aerrow]

Seriously? Back in my day the cut off year was 30.... Sheesh.

I guess the older the world gets the younger the gays gotta be.

I say don't worry about what people say on the matter, remind them you are only as old as you behave.

[spilovn]

In London there's a famous gay pub called the elephants graveyard…… you'll be a spring chicken.

[Steve]

Seriously, take Double007's advice. That's the reasonable solution.

...Back in my day the cut off year was 30.... Sheesh.

Holy Methuselah Batman! You just said a cotton pickin' mouthful!
Turning 30 back when god was a boy meant they revoked your password to popular clubs unless you were 1) a drug dealer, or 2) you wanted to get pointed at as if you were wearing your belt just under your nipples. No fun. When Mark and I turned the age of black balloons our strategy to be noticed by other living men under 30 was to hang with the drug dealer. It's terrible advice, I know, but talk about hanging out with the most popular kids in school! We went to any bar we wanted, even the straight titty bar across the street. The girls were funny as shit and seeing 90 year old men wearing khaki pants with Velcro tennis shoes sport boners watching bouncing gazonga's was a goddamn hoot and a half. Hey, we were only 30! At thirty you can still get away with age discrimination. Older now I'm once again back to "Oh the pain! The pain of it all". Plus the drug dealer is now in prison. Viagra drug dealers just don't have the same kind of pull.

Oh, and here's a tip Blueeyedwonder: Don't walk into a leather bar wearing yellow unless you like whiskey sour's sans the whiskey.


[COLOR="Navy"]Robin: "Where'd you get a live fish, Batman?"
Batman: "The true crimefighter always carries everything he needs in his utility belt, Robin."[/COLOR]
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[East]

I worked in a gay club for 20 years and when I was not working I loved big dance clubs and I was into dancing by myself on the stage a lot until I was 28...I stopped because I met my lover then and have been together with him almost 30 years...

The guys I was clubbing with ....a lot of guys in their 30s...maybe 40s....I don't think age is as big a factor as some people do. I was 40 when I quit bartending and I was at the top of my game and consistently brought in more money than everyone else.....they did not want me to leave obviously ...but I was done...

I actually never had one person tell me I was too old. I have heard a few guys talking about the subject but never participated because I think it is ageist.....

There is the circuit boy thing.....I was never a part of that....not sure what the age thing is with them but they all seem to be in their 20s if I remember right....

[Blueeyedwonder]

Cheers guys, thanks for the replies!

I won't start panicking about it yet then.... For another 5 years maybe haha! I guess its because society is obsessed by youth but objectively 25 is still very young!