Ouch

[alaa]

hello again.as i metioned before i have a couple of quastions.one of them is.i like to have sex(who doesn't)but evry time i do it hurts like it was my first time.literlly evrytime feels like a first time to me..and please dont say:use a lot of lube and preparetion cuz i do.sound like im going to be a virgne my whole life.i bet the tops like it.
so any advice??????

[DonJon]

What are you emotionally feeling whenever you do it? Are you stressed or relaxed? Cause based from what I know (and experienced) you need to relax and be comfortable so the muscles all over your body including deep down under can become less tense.

However, if you still get the ouch I think you need to see a physician or a sex therapist.

mile:

[Hardheaded1]

Is it possible your tops are just inconsiderate? Are they taking time to relaxing you, gradually preparing you?

Or is it possible that they are just hasty and horny and ripping away with no regard to your comfort and experience?

[alaa]

no they are not.they are the opposite of evry thing you said.

[BrianNorth]

Try and have no expectations. If you've not been receptive much then you're not going to be an old pro at it within a few times. The more relaxed you are the better

[Bowyn Aerrow]

I read that 62% of gay men don't do anal. Frontage, Oral, Masturbation, and other things happen.

Like it or not the anus is not designed for fucking. It is designed to expel waste, and yes the prostate is where it is, but not so much because the anus is there but because the sex organs of the human male is where it is.

Not every man enjoys his prostate being tickled, prodded, poked, massages or hammered on.

Not every man can develop the relaxation of the sphincter muscles to readily accept an invader.

Not every man can get over his hang-up of 'ew shit on a dick'.


Things that MIGHT help:

1. Know your partner. This is where relationships come into play. You are more likely to trust a man who you do other things with more than a man who you have 'just sex with.' Trust is key to relaxation. For many, without trust they can't relax, mentally, emotionally, physically.

--> Which is to say you are not cut of the cloth of casual sex.

2. Fingering - sort of foreplay activity raises your excitement, which in turn lowers your pain thresh hold. Porn does do one thing right (perhaps just one) with it formula script of oral for a bit before anal... Most guys who suck dick get turned on by that, being excited makes them more receptive.

3. Understand that unless you are getting plowed on a regular basis, your anus and ass and rectum and sphincter are going to do exactly what they are suppose to do - hold stuff in until it convenient to expel things.

Having regular anal intercourse leads to your butt adapting to find that acceptable.

Typically it takes 1-2 weeks of regular (like every other day, or daily) anal sex for a bottom to get into it with the arse becoming more receptive. Going for a month or longer one ends up back at square one - well assuming they haven't been ruined with fisting, gang bangs, sitting on traffic cones...




Dildoe and butt-plugs may help to loosen you up. But there appears to be this instant gratification aspect in the modern world where guys are trying to use butt plugs and dildoes molded off of Dragons, Godzilla and King Kong, instead of starting off with smaller, more readily handled sized ones.

Stretching of the sphincters (The primary cause of pain when it comes to anal-sex) should be slow process. IF you know you are going to have sex at 9pm, then around 7 pm you slip into the bathroom and use a minor sized butt plug, one that will keep your sphincter stretched about 1/2 to 3/4 the diameter of the average dick or the dick you are expecting to receive.

Average is rather small:

In a study of penis size where measurements were taken in a laboratory setting, the average penis circumference when erect was 4.8 inches (12.3 cm)

(source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human_penis_size)

Using high end maths, diameter comes to be 1.527 inches or 3.91 cm

[RickieVz]

A great trick is take a hot bath, relax and finger yourself. Out of the water feel the muscles around your finger. Learn to relax them... Lube is a great help. Slowly try a second finger and just relax.

Same could be done with a sex toy. Insert and leave it. Start out small. A butt plug is great to help stretch you a bit.

If you don't have anal sex for a few days it will be like starting over. You will become tight all over again.

[Unsure17]

The best tip is too use it regularly, weather solo or with someone else. But keep in mind when your own your own dlife my use anything ridiculous, you don't want to rip yourself open. And when you are with someone else just relax, close your eyes take deep breathes and embrace the feeling!
xx