I had a threesome.

[VK19]

Well,
I have been seeing this man for over a year. It cannot be said we are a couple or that we are in an open relationship. I know for a fact he dates women, he doesn't hide it, but guys I'm not too sure since he never mentions anything.
I don't see anybody else because I am deeply in love with him. And well...
About a month ago, we had a threesome with one of his friends. We were at my partner's house and one thing led to another. His friend made the first move and it caught me by surprise. I immediately looked at my partner and he wasn't upset. His friend kept kissing my neck and caressing me while I had a big question mark on my face. That's when he joined, and well, we had a threesome.
I thought it was ok, I thought he wanted it. While we where having sex, my only concern was to pleasure my partner and he seemed into it. Even when his friend finished, we still had sex for a little while and we were really into each other. The next morning, the three of us had sex again.

When his friend left, he was extremely quiet. I tried talking to him only to found out he was extremely mad at me. He yelled at me if that was what I was after, being f'kd by men with money, that if I wanted to change my profession to a high maintenance s't I might as well since I'm only in for the money... I tried explaining, I tried apologising but he was so mad at me he kicked me out of his house and have not spoken to me since.

I have been feeling pretty bummed out and I feel extremely guilty for what happened. It's not like I wanted a threesome but I did it anyway. And I know before supposing anything, I should have talked to him. I feel sad, really.

Thank you for reading, I needed to vent somehow because I can't talk to anyone about this.

xx

[xfrostx]

That's pretty weird. First he's into this and then lashes out on you like this? That seems very fishy. I think that you don't really need such people in your life and it's better to move on. My best guess is that he hasn't really figured out what he is and he was ashamed, but that's no way to treat you

[Borg69]

Being caught up in the moment and ruled by your genitals is a separate beast of the monster that is jealousy and regrets after the fact once the genitals have been sated.

I think he had plenty of time to voice his concerns. Him going along with it could only be viewed as consent. Whatever his feelings of embarrassment are now having his friend know I think he's projecting onto you instead of taking responsibility for his own actions.

[Darius]

Why did you apologize? He could have walked out of the room when his friend started up with you. It doesn't sound like you communicate well enough with each other to know what is expected or wanted from your relationship. You are not even sure if you have a relationship, you just know you have feelings for him.

Let us know what happens

[MisterLove]

You did nothing wrong, it's your friend that seems to be manipulative and cynical. I don't want to pass any judgement, though.

[Rareboy]

Boy. Did you just dodge a bullet.. Better after one year than longer.

Your guy is too fucked up....he dates women but also has you on the side.

He doesn't seem to want to commit to you but you are exclusive to him because you love him.

His friend is the one that made the moves and he didn't say anything until after?

Do you have his freind's number? Sounds like he's the one you should be banging.

[Hardheaded1]

Although I'm by no means certain, I'd consider the possibility that your friend set you up. There are all kinds of people in this world, but it's just a bit fishy that a three-way just broke out like a flashmob or something.

Is it possible that your erstwhile partner told his friend about you and staged the threesome?

Is it possible the breakup was also staged, as you already indicated your man was not into a male relationship per se. With you being in love and him not, maybe he assessed that and devised a breakup to free him of the expectation.

Or, he could just be a psycho. It's hard to tell this far away and with you guys being complete strangers to me.

Oh, BTW, where the hell did the "men with money" comment come from?

[Lexington]

OK, what?

You've been seeing this guy sexually. He has other partners. You're only seeing him.

You go to his house. There's another guy there. He starts putting the moves on you. You look to your guy. He doesn't react. In fact, he joins in. You three have sex then, and again the next day.

And then the guy suggests you're just trying to fuck guys with money? Where the Sam Hill did THAT come from? You didn't invite this guy over. You didn't say to him "I'll fuck you for three hundred dollars." You didn't hand him an invoice at the end of the encounter. You just didn't stop the guy when he made moves on you. Should you have "asked permission" from your guy? Why? He was right there. He didn't seem to have a problem with it. He could've said "Hey - could you not do that, Friend?" Instead, he dropped trou and joined in.

It sounds like the guy likes to have several partners, but doesn't want his partners to have anybody else. If that's the sort of relationship you're OK with, fine, but it hardly seems fair. And since he's shut the door, I think the smart thing to do is keep it shut. And if you liked the other guy, maybe see if he's free.

Lex

[MountLogan]

I agree ! I am really confuse.
Look like mis communication but his reaction is really off and I also doesn't understand the money think. Also you said you paid more attention to your BF so I don't get why he would be that jealous.

We may never have his perspective but I feel some piece of the puzzle are missing.
good luck

[Melody]

What a Closet case