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Going to do it !!!
#61
My advice?

Discuss this with a qualified therapist.
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#62
Well the kids seemed to be avoiding both of us they don't seem to even want to be in the same room as the wife and I . That is kinda hard to deal with because they always wanted to be with me and there mother they are almost clingy I really don't blame them for trying to stay back and out of the way. I am trying so hard not to fight and say bad things in front of them but man the wife knows how to push my buttons!!!

She start half way talking to me around 10 this morning but not much. She rather throw things at me instead . I think she is running out of things because she has slowed down on that also . I will be glad when she will finally talk to me so we can try to work threw this .I know this is hard on me and I can't imagine what the kids or the wife are going threw .I am trying to be supportive and say positive things but I am running out of things to say .
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#63
Cuddly,I am going to see a therapist to try and work out a lot of things that I have going on . Like why did this happen now and not along time ago . How do I deal with leaving my kids and wife ,why do I feel like this is all my fault and is it ? Plus more ! I am not going to get into right now maybe later. I am trying to give the wife space but it is hard we live in a small house and there is only so much space lol I do not understand why I picked now to do this why not before I got with her Sad
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#64
Well I came clean to her today about the affair and it went better than I thought it would but it did go kinda bad , she beat the crap out of me !! I did not fight back I deserved it and she had nothing to do with it . She was starting to talk to me but I do not know now she stormed out and I have no idea when she will be back . She left at 8:30 this morning . Before I told her she did ask why I was doing this and how long I had it planned ,she also asked how long I had been gay and why I did not tell her sooner .If she would have known she says that she would have never been with me . Well my kids are home from school I have to go I will be back later .
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#65
Leaving a family is a seriouse step. You should think seven times before doing it, my friend!
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#66
It sounds like everything is out in the open now and that there's not a lot you can do but be there for your kids and let your wife process this. She's suffered a huge loss and will go through a lot of different emotions while she comes to terms with your being gay.

It's easy to fall into the trap of regret but maybe, just maybe, this was the right time to tell her? At least you have your children who I am sure bring incredible joy to the both of you. If you had been sure of your sexuality earlier and never got with your wife, the kids never would have been born. If you had waited ten more years, she might have taken the news even harder, plus the two of you would have been stuck in the marriage for that much longer. It's so hard to say.
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#67
Well I want to say thank you IvanSalnikov and Nanaki for being so supportive and giving me advice . I know that this is really hard on me I can 't imagine what she is going threw and I am still really worried she has not come home yet and I am loosing my mind and the kids are really scared that something bad has happened to her . I keep telling them that she is OK she will be home later I hate lying to them but I do not know what else to do .
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#68
lonley Wrote:WOW reaper you calling me a troll !
I copied this from your coming out story .
A few weeks ago I decided to break out of my comfort zone and decided to explore it all. I went to a gay bondage club. I was quite nervous about the entire thing. I took me a few minutes to build up the will to walk inside. Then I got moving, I walked down a hall leading to the entrance....a gay flag hung down the wall. It made me laugh inside. Then I went in...it was the real deal.

I didn't do anything that night. I just observed (a lot of people don't actually get involved in the actual play) I've been back a few times and do partake. (not sex, but it is sexual)


I say that is so far fetched sounds like you watched a porno and thought that it would be believable and it is not !!

Actually its sounds legit to me. Simply because I have been to BDSM clubs (sex clubs) as an observer and never participated. Though I did participate in BDSM activities with partners at home. In fact it was my first lover who took me to my very first sex club so I could get a better education by watching real BDSM taking place instead of watching porn which is staged and misses out on a lot of BDSM reality in order to sell films.

I can tick off at least a dozen people I have known who attended Sex clubs without participation several times before getting into the activities. A lot of sex clubs welcome this more careful approach, especially BDSM where there is a learning curve between the fantasy of BDSM and the reality of it.
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#69
I don't know what one gains from trolling? Entertainment? Even trolls are allowed to post I guess...but they really shouldn't be.
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#70
She finally came back home late last night and I was able to get her to talk to me again . There was alot of yelling and crying on both sides . She has asked me to move out and to go as soon as I can ,she is not forcing me to leave she did ask nicely and I said ok I will . She does want a divorce and I told her that she can have one I have no right to tell her no and that I want her to have the house and the kids need to stay with her so they can remain in the home and go to the same school with there friends .I am trying not to upset there lives any more than I have to . I agreed to pay child support and they can come see me anytime they want I will not make them . Today we started going threw things and splitting them up she is really being fair with me and we are trying not to fight in front of the kids . I will update more when I can
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