Gay Parties

[princealbertofb]

Yes these new technologies have 'hurt' a lot of the old ways of interacting. Maybe you have to make them fashionable again... become a great party giver. But one does need the connections and the space, possibly even a swimming pool or big garden.

duh, forgot an S... restored now.

[jimcrackcorn]

My husband and I used to host parties frequently back in the 70's & early 80's. Most of the time it was a mixed group of straights and gays. We also had a group of gay couples (around 6 to 8 couples) who would all get together regularly and have a great time. I don't believe any of those parties had more than 20 people - except one time when a bunch of shipmates appeared at my door one Friday night without giving me notice beforehand. It still worked out, I just opened up the patio doors and stuck them out there until the party inside thinned out (smile)...

In the last couple years, I have tried to meet other gay couples and start a little get-together,, but that never panned out. It seems we are out of the loop nowadays...

Jim

[ShiftyNJ]

At first I thought you meant like circuit parties, but I'm gathering you mean house parties?

It is a different world, to be sure. There are a lot fewer bars than there used to be, too. I blame not only the apps but the fact that people are more integrated and hang out in mixed crowds. Or I'm just old and not in the know.

There is one very nice guy, a friend of a friend really, who kind of adopted me when the mutual friend moved away. He has a great Halloween party every year, for which he has his whole house wired for special effects and decorations. Then he bought a shore house, and I've been invited there a few times too. Not really in a position to reciprocate so I helped out with some reno projects instead.

[Iceblink]

I think they still exist, but not as frequently as they once were. I remember back in the day, there was almost not a weekend when there was not some kind of party going on and sometimes more than one, both Friday and Saturday. Occasionally you could even find one during the week. One thing that was different then is that the bar/club scene was often a means to initially get the word out there was a party. That scene is not as vibrant today as it once was. If I were to throw a party today, I would be very leery of doing it through social media as you lose even more control than you do of spreading word through a bar or club. Back in the day, word was only going to spread by word of mouth and through phone calls or maybe some printed invites. For the people that would show up at a party that the hosts did not know, you could almost always trace them back by figuring out who told them and then who told that person. You could figure out who might not belong at the party. If word spreads online, who knows who is going to show up. I remember some guys having them so frequently, nicknames would develop for their homes and people would be asking, "Is there a party tonight at The Carnival?" or "Anyone hear of anything going on at the Grand Ballroom?"

[ShiftyNJ]

There's also the whole world of "promoters" and being "on the list" which--if it existed when I was younger--I was oblivious to it. I have a FB friend who is a DJ and very prolific self-promoter; he works 3-5 nights a week between NJ and NYC and they have weekly parties that run for a while, some in hotels or other spaces in addition to nightclubs. He has a younger (20s-30s) following and this seems to be the thing at least here.

[Iceblink]

Those promoted ones were going on when I was young and I have to believe many are still going on. I was going to them way back in the 80's. Most of them were in warehouses or lofts or an empty building, but sometimes in some creative places. I once went to one in Detroit held out in the open, under the stars directly beneath the Ambassador Bridge, the large suspension bridge between the U.S. and Canada. I've been to more than one that was busted, but unless you were the people that threw the party, you were just sent on your way, although that didn't stop people from panicking and running like fools.

[East]

I think they still exist, but not as frequently as they once were. I remember back in the day, there was almost not a weekend when there was not some kind of party going on and sometimes more than one, both Friday and Saturday. Occasionally you could even find one during the week. One thing that was different then is that the bar/club scene was often a means to initially get the word out there was a party. That scene is not as vibrant today as it once was. If I were to throw a party today, I would be very leery of doing it through social media as you lose even more control than you do of spreading word through a bar or club. Back in the day, word was only going to spread by word of mouth and through phone calls or maybe some printed invites. For the people that would show up at a party that the hosts did not know, you could almost always trace them back by figuring out who told them and then who told that person. You could figure out who might not belong at the party. If word spreads online, who knows who is going to show up. I remember some guys having them so frequently, nicknames would develop for their homes and people would be asking, "Is there a party tonight at The Carnival?" or "Anyone hear of anything going on at the Grand Ballroom?"

YES! This is exactly what I am talking about. There was always a party every weekend and people would talk about it the week before...and after...and crowd control was easy because it was kinda understood how things worked.....

Looking back..there were some really great parties and I loved the vibe and meeting people and having great conversations....it is sad to think that has disappeared.

The club scene was definitely the gateway though ...didn't think of that before.....it wouldn't work now because too many things have changed. I don't think I ever gave a second thought to someone ripping me off in my house and I don't remember ever hearing it happen to anyone else...I don't think you can say the same today...

I never went to any of the pop up parties but the promoted one I loved that was kinda "official" was the annual bartenders bash at Trocadero Transfer in SF....damn....

[Virge]

BIg parties like what [MENTION=18508]East[/MENTION] described in the OP.... No I haven't yet except for a few times in Briz and Gold Coast but never with hundreds of gay guys.... The biggest was about 50 and I knew at least half of them by name....

This May we are definitely going to Pensacola for the big Memorial Day thing they do which is crowds into the thousands from all we've found out so far

Around here... hahaha in the summer... our B&B is the best gay place in over 400 miles north east west and south....... and it'll be better this year since we added on... from June 3rd to Sept 8th we ought to have about 20 gay bikers here every day so it's going to be like having a small gay bar right in my house... just far enough away from the real big crowds at Sturgis to be under the radar.

[edhued]

The thing is, we've grown older, so possibly we've outgrown the age of decent invitation.. We're no longer good 'meat', but we can still hold a good conversation. tadahhh!

Hahaha but I like that kind of meat though. On the other hand I noticed that most of the people at these parties are 40+, literally most of the time I'm the youngest among them. Although people my age get invited (20s), but they don't show up. I'm not sure, but probably because they want a different kind of gathering.

[Darius]

100 gay men together doesn't sound like a party I would want to attend. And no, I am not self loathing.