What makes a guy attractive?

[dude]

No they don't always agree on what they find attractive.

Some guys do get hit on more than others. "from each according to his ability; to each according to his need" does apply in sexual attraction.

Would you elaborate?

[ShiftyNJ]

Attraction has nothing to do with "what women like" vs. "what men like". It has -everything- to do with what each individual person likes... because we all like different things, or focus on different things while not caring about other things. Preferences are as diverse as the personality of every person who has one.

Although, @Lexington is probably right about the dick pics thing.

Science theorizes that men are more ocular-ly stimulated (drawn to visual) than women. I don't know if it's true or not, but men DO seem to watch a hell of a lot more porn than women (and get more turned on by it).

I saw something (one of those funny-cos-it's-true type things) saying (straight/cis) women's porn was a buff guy doing household chores.

[dude]

and i said it's the CONNECTION that is paramount. not personality. the two are not the same.

i have hooked up with guys i didn't find physically attractive at all initially, just because we had the connection. one guy, i didn't even notice he existed the first few times i met him. and i would have never been interested in him based on his looks alone. he approached me. he came talking to me. he touched me. and something was there (which obviously i'd missed completely), and the weird thing was that i started to see how attractive he actually was, physically, in full contradiction to what i thought in my head the very first time i saw him. he was fucking beautiful, and i would have never known that had it not been for the presence of an intense connection between us. personality never played into it (but his wasn't the type to turn me off, so that helped). the connection carried it all.

it wasn't the looks that got me to the personality underneath. it was the connection that got me to see beauty (that was surely there, and that i had missed for some inexplicable reason).

looks isn't a window to one's personality, at least not the way that you think. looks do translate personality underneath, but it's always in the context of how the guy carries himself and what he's made of. if it's empty shells inside and underneath, you might just be a plastic doll, for all i care.

so, other than the connection, it's a package deal. looks have to actually be backed up with something more substantial. there are beautiful guys all over the planet, and if you think you're unique with your looks in some way, you're wrong. good looks isn't a rarity, beautiful good looking men are all over the place around you. so the ones that actually back off their good looks, those are the really attractive ones. and no, personality on its own is not enough either. but --- connection on its own is enough.

oh wow. So there is more to it. You guys are making me look bad

[dude]

I saw something (one of those funny-cos-it's-true type things) saying (straight/cis) women's porn was a buff guy doing household chores.

while she lays on the couch, watches chick flicks and eats ice cream. That is feminist porn, but the guy should be naked and have an erection.

[meridannight]

Attraction has nothing to do with "what women like" vs. "what men like". It has -everything- to do with what each individual person likes... because we all like different things, or focus on different things while not caring about other things. Preferences are as diverse as the personality of every person who has one.

eh, attraction has EVERYTHING to with whether i am interested in a guy or not. and by attraction, i mean connection (i really can't stress this connection thing enough. it is PARAMOUNT). but the connection is not dependent on some predetermined aesthetic qualities. it's the way you two react to each other, it's something only you and the other guy feel and are aware of. and that is the most important thing of all.

it has nothing to do with what i like. or things that i like. connection completely ignores what i might like or not. i like dark hair, and body hair on a guy. does that mean i like every guy with dark hair and body hair? no. does it mean i won't like a guy with blonde hair and no body hair? again, no. things don't go a long way on their own, without an actual guy to give definition to them.

[Virge]

Would you elaborate?

What's the elaborate about? Sexual attraction isn't an eleemosynary adventure for men or women. The word "fair" doesn't apply. If it did all women would have the same size tits and men would have the same size penises.

Ask 100 women and 100 gay men if they'd prefer to have sex with Adam Sandler or Chris Hemsorth.

[MikeW]

Interesting. Are you saying that men are more shallow than women?

Are you suggesting that forming an emotional bond with another human being is somehow a deeper and more noble activity than just fucking their brains out?

[IvanSalnikov]

A good cologne, fancy clothes, confidence and power.

[Iceblink]

Looks open the door to the personality.

Yes, that is true in most cases, but one you have gotten to the point where you realize and acknowledge that, shouldn't you also be to the point where you are willing to take a chance and sometimes look behind the doors you normally would not? We do not have to be a slave to cultural norms and expectations.

[Wade]

A good cologne, fancy clothes, confidence and power.

So.... Dick Cheney?