Confessions

[Virge]

[SIZE="2"]Confess something, here.

Back in November, I bought a bottle of red wine. It was corked, rather than capped. I didn't have a cork screw. I tried to open it without a corkscrew. There is now a huge stain on my bedroom wall. I felt really stupid afterwards. It stares at me, everyday, judging me. I could paint over it, but I need someone to help me. I think I'll tell my brother - he seems like a big drinker. I'm not a huge drinker - if anything, drinking often has made me tired of drinking rather than drawing me towards it. I used to talk to this person I met on a forum - he is an alcoholic. I was telling him about it, and he spoke to me as if I was an alcoholic, which was a bit worrying - as if going to a lot of effort to uncork a bottle was in alcoholic territory. But then I remembered that I've grown up in (and still live in) Ireland. We Irish have a different attitude to things. If we buy something, we're going to get our money's worth. Like stereotypical Jews, we aren't afraid to get our hands dirty in the pursuit of saving money, but we Irish have no shame so we can shame ourselves in the process.[/SIZE]

This ISTHE most DisorganizedCONFESSIONEver Written.
[SIZE="6"][COLOR="Red"]I don't know whether I should...
take up a collection to buy you a corkscrew with instructions...
Send you some wallpaper....
Help send your brother to rehab...
or help you get counseling for your
compulsion to stereotype.

I'm going to sit back and sip some good old Irish Jameson
until I decide not worry about it. [/COLOR][/SIZE]


HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA!

[himself]

This ISTHE most DisorganizedCONFESSIONEver Written.
[SIZE="6"][COLOR="Red"]I don't know whether I should...
take up a collection to buy you a corkscrew with instructions...
Send you some wallpaper....
Help send your brother to rehab...
or help you get counseling for your
compulsion to stereotype.

I'm going to sit back and sip some good old Irish Jameson
until I decide not worry about it. [/COLOR][/SIZE]


HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA!

Look, I don't do sentences. I am stupid.

[Virge]

Look, I don't do sentences. I am stupid.

That's okay... It's sort of fun reading posts like yours.... It's like getting a letter written on a spool of ribbon scraps taped together.

[Lexington]

I confess I don't know how to open a bottle of wine with a corkscrew....mainly because I'm never in a position to do so. I hardly ever drink wine.

Lex

[MikeW]

Ok, well, damn.

I mean, you know, urrmmm…. true confessions? I wouldn't even know where to begin.

So, I duno, I guess, for now, I'll pass…

[Cuddly]

I confess! I hate getting up early and I hate morning traffic.

[Satinesque]

I love the Irish! I tend to look up to them! If I visited Ireland, I'd never want to come back to this miserable, soul-free mainland!

[Iceblink]

So this confession really was about opening a wine bottle? I thought you were talking about something personal you were doing with the wine bottle.

[Miles]

Oh shit we were supposed to do our own confessions, whoops.

I laugh to myself mentally whenever I'm wanking in the bathroom and ma knocks on the door and lets me know supper's ready and I reply, "Ok, I'm cumming."

[himself]

I was quite drunk last night when I posted this. I feel a bit stupid, now.