help knowing myself

[uilina]

Hi there, basically for a while i've noticed i've been attracted to men as well as woman. I've accepted that there is a possibility that i could be bisexual but I'm still not sure how I can get to know. Can anyone suggest some tips on how i can approach this issue? I really don't know what to do!!

[MikeW]

Hi there, basically for a while i've noticed i've been attracted to men as well as woman. I've accepted that there is a possibility that i could be bisexual but I'm still not sure how I can get to know. Can anyone suggest some tips on how i can approach this issue? I really don't know what to do!!

There are [url=
http://www.allthetests.com/relationship-...?katb=1080"]online tests[/url] that I wouldn't take TOO seriously, but they can sometimes provide a way of thinking about the question. "Straight," "gay," "bi," etc., are useful social labels but they are just that, labels, constructs, boxes we put ourselves and one another in more as a matter of social convenience than necessarily being accurate. Take "gay" for example… It doesn't tell us whether someone is top or bottom or both or leather or bear or twik or otter or D/s or even "hot" for that matter We also say "just be yourself," which I think means something more like, "relax, enjoy, don't worry, be happy, it's all good, w/e!"

[Borg69]

Desire. Passion. Craving. Hunger. Lust. Infatuation. Obsession. Intrigue. Attraction. Longing. Hopes. Dreams. Fantasies. Arousal... What do you feel?

[EvenOlderButWiser]

The first thing is not to define yourself by your sexuality. Its a part of you, but thats all it is.

As long as your accepting of the fact that you may be Bi (or gay but unsure) then you will be fine. Just go with the flow and how you feel. Regardless of what label you choose to give yourself, your still the same person you were yesterday.

There is no need to suddenly announce your new found desires to all and sundry, if indeed to anyone at all.

to the forum!

[TwisttheLeaf]

Exploration works well at defining what you want, what you're interested in, and what you like.

Welcome to GS, man.

[Pyromancer]

When I first joined GS (not that long ago) I listed myself as "curious" --- I was trying to sort through having just met a guy and being hit with overwhelming infatuation/lust...I'd always managed to ignore my "guy crushes" before...not this time. And though we only lasted about a month, it left no doubt in my mind as to my orientation.

You need to look at how strong your attraction to guys is...strong enough to act on it? Because I think that's the only way you'll ever know for sure.

[Lexington]

I usually suggest this to any guy who is wondering if he might be gay or bi.

Try it out.

Seriously. Try it out. Assume you're gay/bi. See how it fits. Go through the day thinking gay/bi thoughts if any come to mind. Feel free to (surreptitiously) check out guys when you're out and about. Watch gay porn. Jerk off while thinking about guys. And let yourself go with it - don't tiptoe into it, or wonder whether you're doing it right, or what it all means. Think about you kissing/sucking/fucking that guy (or that guy kissing/sucking/fucking you), and really get into it. And when you're done, don't immediately zip up and rush off to something else. Enjoy the afterglow. Think about how much you enjoyed it.

Give it a try. See how it goes.

Lex

[Albie]

Take some time to think about things. Sometimes life gets hectic, that I forget who I am. In those times, it is best to get away and take a few deep breathes and just get your mind in order.

[Rareboy]

At 23, you have realized this in good time.

Dive in. Explore. Experiment. Have fun.

[Wade]

The absolute best thing you can do, honestly, is not to fret about it. Whatever your sexuality, it doesn't change anything about who you are fundamentally... just who ya wanna fuck. It's not a big deal, regardless of what the culture tells you.

Just be you. Ya meet a guy you like, Great! You meet a girl you like, Awesome! Whatever. It's not a big deal.