First Gay Experience?

[LJay]

Meh.

Too many clothes.

[Meerkat54]

[Copied from "Need Your Advice" thread (Online Dating)]

My first experience was mid-last year with a guy roughly 2 years older than me. We hadn't dated or met in person for about a month or two, and were thus Skyping/chatting online for ages (partly because I wasn't able to physically go anywhere at the time). During that time you can obviously pick up that we learnt a lot about each other during that time that most other people would have otherwise found out through normal dates.
Getting to know the basics of each other (what we liked, what we did, where we lived) soon grew into late night phone-calls that pretty much had us talking about life and the universe - they were some serious conversations.
As a result when we met in person for the first time, it was at his house. At the time I thought it was alright since we'd already gotten to know each other so much, so in our own way we both trusted each other enough to meet him at his home. His parents had left for a few weeks on a trip so we had the house to ourselves, and obviously we both took this to our advantage so we decided that I would stay at his place for a few days.
The first night we started cuddling and, ultimately, making out. The following few nights we increased the intensity of our kissing sessions but we agreed to never go "all the way", so we just kept making out and jerked/blew each other off. (Dunno if it's too soon for me to be getting so detailed haha - if so, I apologize hahaha. The mods can just edit this down. Either way I've seen a lot of 'detailed' posts around the place so I guess it's ok haha)

Now don't get me wrong. It was an incredible experience just to be with someone else and I enjoyed every minute with him - in the end I didn't want to leave haha. We'd even made it official (privately, at the time) that we were boyfriends. But as the weeks went by I looked back and I was like "No, that just doesn't feel right to me.. That shouldn't have gone the way it did, let alone the fact that ultimately it wasn't what/how I wanted to do things, relationship-wise".
I was still trying to figure out a lot of personal things at the time, and me being with him was ultimately, I decided, an experiment/experience that did need to happen for those reasons. And it made me realize that I wasn't OK with it, and that wasn't how I wanted to play it out. I didn't say that to him directly when I broke up with him (dunno whether I should have told him or not), but I basically said there's too much going on in my life right now and I don't have time for boyfriends, so I didn't lie completely as I still sort of referenced that aspect. I knew that if I told him that I would have pissed him off tenfold (as you would imagine... can you imagine someone saying to you "Hey, those nights we spent together to realize that we now love each other? I really only did that to experiment with my life, sorry."), and he was still a generally nice guy so I would have accepted it if we remained friends, and we did. It took him a while to come around to the realization that it was over and I had moved on rather quickly, but he got there.

So that's the story of my first experience. Short n' sweet.

[Blackout]

[Copied from "Need Your Advice" thread (Online Dating)]

My first experience was mid-last year with a guy roughly 2 years older than me. We hadn't dated or met in person for about a month or two, and were thus Skyping/chatting online for ages (partly because I wasn't able to physically go anywhere at the time). During that time you can obviously pick up that we learnt a lot about each other during that time that most other people would have otherwise found out through normal dates.
Getting to know the basics of each other (what we liked, what we did, where we lived) soon grew into late night phone-calls that pretty much had us talking about life and the universe - they were some serious conversations.
As a result when we met in person for the first time, it was at his house. At the time I thought it was alright since we'd already gotten to know each other so much, so in our own way we both trusted each other enough to meet him at his home. His parents had left for a few weeks on a trip so we had the house to ourselves, and obviously we both took this to our advantage so we decided that I would stay at his place for a few days.
The first night we started cuddling and, ultimately, making out. The following few nights we increased the intensity of our kissing sessions but we agreed to never go "all the way", so we just kept making out and jerked/blew each other off. (Dunno if it's too soon for me to be getting so detailed haha - if so, I apologize hahaha. The mods can just edit this down. Either way I've seen a lot of 'detailed' posts around the place so I guess it's ok haha)

Now don't get me wrong. It was an incredible experience just to be with someone else and I enjoyed every minute with him - in the end I didn't want to leave haha. We'd even made it official (privately, at the time) that we were boyfriends. But as the weeks went by I looked back and I was like "No, that just doesn't feel right to me.. That shouldn't have gone the way it did, let alone the fact that ultimately it wasn't what/how I wanted to do things, relationship-wise".
I was still trying to figure out a lot of personal things at the time, and me being with him was ultimately, I decided, an experiment/experience that did need to happen for those reasons. And it made me realize that I wasn't OK with it, and that wasn't how I wanted to play it out. I didn't say that to him directly when I broke up with him (dunno whether I should have told him or not), but I basically said there's too much going on in my life right now and I don't have time for boyfriends, so I didn't lie completely as I still sort of referenced that aspect. I knew that if I told him that I would have pissed him off tenfold (as you would imagine... can you imagine someone saying to you "Hey, those nights we spent together to realize that we now love each other? I really only did that to experiment with my life, sorry."), and he was still a generally nice guy so I would have accepted it if we remained friends, and we did. It took him a while to come around to the realization that it was over and I had moved on rather quickly, but he got there.

So that's the story of my first experience. Short n' sweet.

"increased the intensity of our kissing sessions." what a lengthy way of putting it.

The thing that i dont get is this business about "Well we've just met so we probably shouldn't go 'all the way' but sticking our dicks in each other's mouths is fine".
Then why not go all the way if you're going to at some point anyway, and if you're rushing into any kind of sexual activity already? People kid themselves thinking that blowjobs are fine because they are "not sex". And this isn't a age thing. You may be young but I've had the odd guy near my age do the same. It's impatience.

Anyway i changed the subject. Spoops.

[al18s69]

I was 15, he was 40.

[Meerkat54]

The thing that i dont get is this business about "Well we've just met so we probably shouldn't go 'all the way' but sticking our dicks in each other's mouths is fine".
Then why not go all the way if you're going to at some point anyway, and if you're rushing into any kind of sexual activity already? People kid themselves thinking that blowjobs are fine because they are "not sex". And this isn't a age thing. You may be young but I've had the odd guy near my age do the same. It's impatience.

Short answer: It just wasn't something I felt confident/comfortable in, whether I was topping/bottoming/blowjobbing/jerking or not. And for my first actual experience with anyone, I didn't want to dive straight into anything serious that I may have later regretted as a result of it being a first experience.
I know how it looks and I get your point, but under those circumstances me and him both knew what boundaries had been placed, and what we were comfortable/uncomfortable with.

Don't get me wrong, though, I learnt from that experience that I dislike tonguing. So whilst I didn't do something 'all the way', I still got something informative out of it.

Long answer: Read the discussion on this thread for further information, from post #11 .
https://gayspeak.com/showthread.php?p=637786#post637786

[SweetGabriella]

I remembered when I was in high school, people would call me queer or gay because I talked, walked, and smile like a girl. That was baback in 1998 when I was 17. There was a chatline that I called to talk to girls. However, a much older man in his 40s decided to talk to me. After hearing his voice and the things that he wanted to do me, I became gay naturally. I've dated a few girls but never had sex with them. I started to think about the man that I talked to, I started to long for a man. I wanted to be touched, kissed, and having sex with the same sex. I met my husband to be online like a year ago. Happy to say that he took my virginity away from me on the night that we first met face to face. He took me out to dinner but took me to his home. I was wearing a really nice dress with pump shoes. I was nervous but I let him take off my dress while touching me and I took off his clothes and he laid me down in bed. The experience was great so I told him that he was the person that I was longing for. Being gay and being with a man that I'm about to spend the rest of my life with is one of the best decisions that I ever made

[SweetGabriella]

Oh yeah, I'm 34 even though I look in my early 20s and he is 54 *giggles*

[questioning9]

Ok.. Hopefully this will get answered... But what was your first gay experience? And by experience i mean from Kissing, Holding hands, Touching, Crushing on the same gender.

I have never really had a sexual experience with another guy. I mean, I have wanted to kiss the guys that I had fallen in lvoe iwth but was afraid that they would get violent on me because i didn't know whether they were gay or not. I had a huge crush on my friends. I would touch guys on their heads but not in a sexual manner. I would also pat them on the shoulder at times and give them a compliment about their appearance. Gosh, you're cute. They're looking at you all weird. Just to a few guys in life that i was attracted to. other than that, no.

[questioning9]

I started having feelings for men when I was 12. I am now 20. Trust me, when i was 12, I began to google naked pictures of male celebrities and models. occasionally, I would come across a few fakes here and there on deviantart. At age 14, started gay porn watching and haven't stopped ever since. mostly on the weekend when my parents are away and when I am left all alone and have the whole house to myself.

[Chase]

Ok.. Hopefully this will get answered... But what was your first gay experience? And by experience i mean from Kissing, Holding hands, Touching, Crushing on the same gender.

When I watched Star Wars for the first time I thought Luke Skywalker was cute.