Gym buddies

[STP]

Thanks everyone for the valuable advice! I do want to come out eventually to family and close friends, but I realize now that it is silly of me to think that I have the obligation to come out in this situation. I will wait until I feel I am ready (hopefully rather sooner than later, although I've always been a bit of a coward so who knows), and I'll expect them to be respectful of me as I am of them.

[Jay]

Hi everyone! Im new to this forum.

I am not openly gay to family or friends in general, but a month ago I started going with two male friends to the gym. I started becoming physically attracted to one of them... Im fairly confident that they are both straight, so my questions are:

• Is it strange for gay people to go to the gym with straight friends?
  
• Should I tell them that I am gay?
  

They are not homophobic, but the thing is we change on the gym so I see them semi-naked. I imagine they could be uncomfortable with the idea of me looking at them while they change if they knew Im gay.

Id like to:

• Reduce the anxiety Im feeling every time I go to the gym because I have to act like I dont think one of my buddies is cute
  
• Respect their rights (IDK if they kind of have the right to know, given that we are gym buddies)
  
• Not lose them as friends, even if I decide to come out to them later.
  

I appreciate any advice on this, thank you, cool forum!

In general, I would advise to leave anything personal at the gym's doorstep. It's not necessary to tell them that you are gay. Just focus on doing workout as that's the main reason to go to gym. Have casual chit chat and make casual gym friends. But don't go overboard.

It's not strange to go to gym with straight friends.

My best friend is straight as an arrow and he knows I'm gay. We become friends through working out in the same gym. We have bromance thingy now. But we have limitation and respect each other's boundaries.

But he's the only one in the gym who knows I'm gay. I have no intention to tell other gym members.

[Rareboy]

Good heaven's of course you can go to the gym with straight guys. Just behave normally. Try not to spring a full boner in the change room when they flaunt their junk in your face.

And as others have said....if they are really your friends....and the time is right over drinks or a meal sometime...you can let them know that you are interested in guys and would blow them all. No wait. strike that last bit....that you are still looking for the right guy out there.

If they are really your buds...they'll be cool. If they are afraid of their own possible same sex desires...they might be a little weird the next time you are together in the locker room. To get over that, casually drop your own trou first and make it clear that you aren't perving on them or anything.

Unless you can't suppress a rock hard erection.

In that case grab a towel and pull the fire alarm.