Is he a top or bottom?

[himself]

I have no experience, but you could use the brute force method and stick a finger up his ass and feel how tight it is.

I would probably take it as it comes. I have an unruly bowel, so maybe topping would be best for me.

[Edward]

If it was up to me only, I definitely wouldn't let sex alone destroy relationships with a man I like.

[princealbertofb]

Ok, Anonymous, I'm going to assume that you already know what your favourite position would be... If you don't actually know, maybe this is a time to experiment and see what's for you and what is not. Some guys really don't like to be bottoming, and some guys find topping difficult, but mostly, one of the fun things about being gay is that you can do both if you set your heart and mind (and lust) to it. Each role provides its set of complications and its own set of rewards, so it's worth knowing what makes your body tick, and what makes his tick. I guess there can't be any answers without questions, so at one point the subject may need to be brought up.
Depending on your mood, you might find that you want him to be top, or you want to top, then it's a question of asking the other what he wants... maybe even deciding that you're going to flip-flop at some point, maybe at a time of changing positions, or changing condoms... or relubing...

[princealbertofb]

I have no experience, but you could use the brute force method and stick a finger up his ass and feel how tight it is.

I would probably take it as it comes. I have an unruly bowel, so maybe topping would be best for me.

Hmmmm, [MENTION=22336]himself[/MENTION], brute force down there???? I doubt it. Not a good idea. That's what I'd call rape. There is a difference between liking it rough and feeling raped. If you've got to the stage where you're having (and liking) it rough, you've probably already established boundaries.

[himself]

Hmmmm, [MENTION=22336]himself[/MENTION], brute force down there???? I doubt it. Not a good idea. That's what I'd call rape. There is a difference between liking it rough and feeling raped. If you've got to the stage where you're having (and liking) it rough, you've probably already established boundaries.

NOOOOO. By brute force, I meant not being ingenious about it. For example, if you were trying to hack into an account, to brute force it would be to just guess loads of passwords. I am not experienced so I don't know if sticking your fingers up there is commonplace. I didn't mean it to come across the way it did.

[princealbertofb]

Ok, [MENTION=22336]himself[/MENTION], I was not aware of that acception of the expression 'the brute force method'... it just sounded rather rough to me.

[Camfer]

are there ways (preferably subtle) to inquire about someone's preferred role prior to moment itself?

Take him out for Mexican food. Order extra refried beans and make sure he eats them. Take him back to your place and make sure it's really quiet. Wait patiently until he farts. If it's a wooshing sound he's a bottom. If it's a whistling sound he's vers. If it's a sqeaking sound he's a top.

Or you could skip all that and just ask him.

[TwisttheLeaf]

*Snickering at [MENTION=20941]Camfer[/MENTION]'s answer.*

Ask him.

In my case, I'm fairly versatile. Strictly top or bottom wouldn't matter. More difficult for me would be if he was say..... very dominant, but strictly a bottom. Or very submissive, but strictly top. For me, this would be more difficult to work with, but I'm sure I could if I needed to.

[Gideon]

I can very happily and very easily shift and accomodate Twist's wants/needs or just the mood of the day.

Though a -strict- top might be a problem for me. I tend to radiate a natural dominance, so I probably attract more bottom personalities than top. And most who have submissive tendencies tend to gravitate toward bottom. It kinda just works out that way.

[Wardo94]

Well, in my experience, most guys stopped talking to me cause' I was a verse. But it was on an hooking up kind of base, so I understood if they weren't interested. Since I'm a verse, I don't mind adapting to one or the other. If it's someone I have feelings for, and I really do like them, then I would try to find other ways to to enjoy sex and messing around.