Had sex with my best friend and scared I spoiled everything

[Borg69]

I agree that you should back off... you're kinda acting like a clingy female after you had sex. He's probably scared you're going to start wanting more... emotionally... from him - like a relationship or something. Just be cool about it and let him know no harm no fowl, NO expectations. You had sex. It doesn't HAVE to be a big deal, if you don't make it one.

[David838]

Thanks for your answers.

[JohnSomebody]

I went through the same thing with a close straight friend...and it was all on his initiation. A few times prior to us actually doing it...he had flirted with me big time...the thing is..if you flirt with me..I will flirt back..but I really just assumed it was all in fun until he started getting totally naked and teasing me with dirty talk and playing with himself. Therefore, he practically begged me to have sex with him and once I did...we wound up spending the whole evening together and had sex a few times throughout the night and even in the morning. However...after saying goodbye that morning...he usually contacted me or came by on a daily basis...but after that evening...I did not hear from him at all...and when he saw me on the street...he did his best to avoid me at all cost. I did not chase after him...I just let things be where he would come to me at his own time....unfortunately ...I never heard or seen him again...I would get the occasional phone calls where all would hear is breathing on the other end and acquaintance had informed me a month later that he saw this guy standing in front of my door in the early morning hours as if he was pondering whether he should ring the door bell ...but never did. Therefore, its not much you can do at this point but to give him time to come around on his own. Good Luck!!!

[Rareboy]

You probably have lost him as a close friend.

I blew one of my 'straight' buds in University after he initiated some mutual JO and he went all weird after. We still spoke but he was never the same.

[ShiftyNJ]

I agree with what everybody else said. I think right now you represent a capability or impulse he either didn't know he had, or didn't know he'd carry through with, and he is avoiding you out of denial. It's unfortunate and I feel bad for you, but I think you can't fight it. Either he will come around, or he won't. The important thing is not to blame yourself that it happened, he was a willing participant and he has to own his part in it.

[Bricg1970]

Only time will do, as other said, both were doing it so it is not only your fault, give him time and space, he may comeback or not, only time will tell, I had the same issue with a friend from the childhood and now we are Ok, but it took time,