The first date
06-06-2015, 07:07 PM
I met a seemingly nice guy on a dating site and after a bit of talking we decided to meet up. Everything went smoothly. We started with lunch, then drinks, then decided to go strolling and as time went by we ended up staying out so long that time came for dinner and dessert. It lasted about eight hours. He kept pushing to prolong the date, "would you wanna get dinner? Would you wanna get dessert?" and so on. When we had first planned the date, it was for coffee or a light lunch. So it ballooned.
Then came the unusual part. The end of the date. At this point we were both in a car (since for part of the date, at his suggestion, we drove elsewhere which offered better walkability). One of us buckled in, the other about to leave the vehicle, we both sat there awkwardly. I tend to let the other guy go in for the hug or kiss, but it didn't happen. We both sorta...just sat there and waited with no talking. So when it didn't happen we ended up just shaking hands. The night then ended. Granted, what seemed like minutes probably only lasted seconds, but the awkwardness felt palpable.
Prior to the handshake I had thought the date went well, and the fact that he kept pushing to prolong the date made me feel good and reassured. But I can't understand why someone who so obviously feels comfortable prolonging a date, and in that sense takes the lead, doesn't then go for at least a hug. Granted, I could have gone for the hug but I was waiting for some sort of invitation that he would not pull back and be like, "whoa just friends". After all, he clearly had some sort of interest, but now I am left to wonder: is his interest just friends? When I told one of my friends he joked snidely: "my boyfriend and I shook hands on the first day....NOT!" His comment completely sunk my confidence.
So far as conversation at the end of the date, he did say he wanted to try and hang out this week. And earlier in the day had said that we should go see an upcoming movie since I had expressed interest in the film (not knowing he too had interest). Until the handshake I thought it all had gone well.
Any thoughts guys? You can imagine I am feeling down about it. If you want to sink my confidence further, be gentle.
Then came the unusual part. The end of the date. At this point we were both in a car (since for part of the date, at his suggestion, we drove elsewhere which offered better walkability). One of us buckled in, the other about to leave the vehicle, we both sat there awkwardly. I tend to let the other guy go in for the hug or kiss, but it didn't happen. We both sorta...just sat there and waited with no talking. So when it didn't happen we ended up just shaking hands. The night then ended. Granted, what seemed like minutes probably only lasted seconds, but the awkwardness felt palpable.
Prior to the handshake I had thought the date went well, and the fact that he kept pushing to prolong the date made me feel good and reassured. But I can't understand why someone who so obviously feels comfortable prolonging a date, and in that sense takes the lead, doesn't then go for at least a hug. Granted, I could have gone for the hug but I was waiting for some sort of invitation that he would not pull back and be like, "whoa just friends". After all, he clearly had some sort of interest, but now I am left to wonder: is his interest just friends? When I told one of my friends he joked snidely: "my boyfriend and I shook hands on the first day....NOT!" His comment completely sunk my confidence.
So far as conversation at the end of the date, he did say he wanted to try and hang out this week. And earlier in the day had said that we should go see an upcoming movie since I had expressed interest in the film (not knowing he too had interest). Until the handshake I thought it all had gone well.
Any thoughts guys? You can imagine I am feeling down about it. If you want to sink my confidence further, be gentle.
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
