Cake, fedoras, horseback riding, skinny-dipping, flying parachute men, gold-plated shotguns, colorblind homosexual fashion? Shit man, that sounds like the most awesome birthday/wedding celebration ever.
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Virge...I am making fun of myself here...
I really like to think of myself as laid back and easy going...LMAO
...but I am sooooooooooooooo fucking difficult...thankfully my BF loves that part of me because I am a real pain in the ass sometimes...
For me..anytime everyone is "expected" to feel a certain way...I start to have a panic attack inside....
What if I don't feel that way?...or I am not happy?..or sad?...and I show it on my face...or say something inappropriate? I have done all of these things before...and it is NOT fun. I sometimes want to laugh at funerals...OMG. Do you know what it is like to try and stop yourself from laughing out loud at a VERY inappropriate time? I know these situations are normal for most people...but for me...it is a HUGE problem...
...and then my conversations...another OMG...my mouth just has a mind of it's own and I have spent my life struggling to get control of it...
For instance...if someone tells me at a funeral...
"Well...they are in a better place now"....I WANT to look sad and nod and give them a hug like most people do...but instead...I blurt out something like "Why the fuck would you say something like that?"
Or at a wedding..."Doesn't the bride look gorgeous?"...and I know the right response.."Oh my...yes she does"...but again....my mouth...EEK! On a good day...I might say "she does look happy"...but I really don't want to be bothered even commenting on that and I dread what might come out of my mouth
It is the same reason I avoid celebrating holidays....
So Virge...It is curtains for me and weddings...even though yours does sound fun...
A day at a wedding or anywhere that I am expected to feel a certain way is as nerve wracking for me as it might be for someone else walking a tightrope across the Grand Canyon....
Oh yeah...I almost forgot...everyone who is close to me knows to never introduce me to anyone because it is pure torture for me to have to say "Nice to meet you" if it wasn't. I have no problem at all saying it IF it really WAS nice to meet them...but if it wasn't...panic attack time...the words won't come out of my mouth...pure torture for me
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[MENTION=18508]East[/MENTION] ........ serious this time......
About all that idiotic crap people say at weddings and funerals..........
OMG..... I want to strangle people when I hear that crap.
Now that you've brought it up That is what I hate most about weddings and funerals
and THANKS FOR POINTING IT OUT.... and making me see it.....
That's going to fit into the ceremony somehow... Anyone who says crap like that is going to be thrown in the lake or be condemned to slap a llama... or join the Ron Jeremy fan club.... I'm admitting I've had a sheltered life I guess. I never heard of him until last night in a room full of drunk gay bikers... I got an education that eye bleach won't erase.
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It would be funny if it were customary after the end of a wedding ceremony for the guests to mingle with each other and say "Well.. they're in a worse place now."
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I'm a : Single Gay Man
Starsign: Libra
Mood:
THE WORLD IS ENDING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Is it?
hmmmmmmmmm
Looks out the widow,
hmmmmm the world is still there.
Or is it a Matrix?
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