08-09-2015, 03:49 PM
How close are we getting to this actual conversation taking place?? [MENTION=22999]MFax74[/MENTION]
I have a crush on my neighbor!
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08-09-2015, 03:49 PM
How close are we getting to this actual conversation taking place?? [MENTION=22999]MFax74[/MENTION]
08-09-2015, 04:51 PM
The conversation happened! I got his number! This morning I texted him, it's been a few hours now, no response. Just asked what his schedule looks like in the next few days... If no response, what should I do? Ego is already feeling a bit damaged...
08-09-2015, 05:03 PM
What did you actually say in the conversation and the texting? He might be busy and not be near his phone for a while. Or he might be considering it, and also wondering what he should do, whether to take the 'risk'/'opportunity' or not. Don't fret, it won't help in any case.
08-09-2015, 05:34 PM
Conversation: there were two actually. First time I introduced myself as I got off the elevator and he got on. He said he knows my ex, which was surprising. Later we coincidentally were on the elevator again and made small talk. As we walked outside I said "this is a shot in the dark, but would you be interested in getting coffee or beer sometime?" He said "sure!" Got each other's numbers, and he said to hit him up. Then we parted ways.
Text: Hi (name)! Was wondering what your schedule looks like over the next few days? Edit--the reason I'm concerned is cuz every time I see him he's on his phone... He must've seen the text awhile ago.
08-09-2015, 06:50 PM
MFax74 Wrote:Conversation: there were two actually. First time I introduced myself as I got off the elevator and he got on. He said he knows my ex, which was surprising. Later we coincidentally were on the elevator again and made small talk. As we walked outside I said "this is a shot in the dark, but would you be interested in getting coffee or beer sometime?" He said "sure!" Got each other's numbers, and he said to hit him up. Then we parted ways. Yes, when you see him, he's on his phone. which is because it's a time when people have time for phones, and need them to go to work and get back after work. I take my phone with me too when I go out, and you might see me texting or calling at that moment, but when I'm at work, it's off, and when I'm at home, there's a chance that the phone is lying somewhere without me noticing it or using it. So it's just possible that while he's in some given place, his phone doesn't have his priority, even if he is of your generation where telephones seem to be like extensions of your fingers. He may also be working things out with other engagements he has.
08-09-2015, 06:56 PM
Ok, then, you can also pretend that the text didn't get to him. Instead, make a proposal of a date and see if he can make it. It's maybe less intrusive than asking what his schedule looks like for the next few days. I'd say something like :
"How about going for a coffee / beer (edit preferred drink) on Friday evening after 6 (adjust as necessary to what fits your timetable)? If you can't make it, no worries, maybe you can make another suggestion for a time when you'd be free?" Then you can text back and forth until you've come to an arrangement that suits you both and don't forget to invite the significant other (in case there is one) or to suggest he comes with a friend, maybe, if you don't feel this would be defeating the point. You'll soon know if his heart is taken. You could still make some new friends. Friends generally lead to newer friends, etc... At this point, I'd focus mainly on getting to know him a bit better and he might feel more comfortable with the option of bringing a friend/partner. Leave some options open, and be happy if it's just the two of you (more intimate).
08-09-2015, 10:27 PM
Thank you, Prince. For starters he is indeed single.
Considering I texted him like 9 hours ago I am beginning to think he was being fake during the conversation. I just don't understand why people can't be up-front. I want to get to the steps in the last part of your post but I don't see it happening now. This is so disappointing. It's getting to me, maybe more than it should...
08-09-2015, 11:28 PM
Be patient. If nothing else you will see him on the elevator.
I bid NO Trump!
08-10-2015, 05:58 PM
LJay, you're right... Being impatient AND hopelessly romantic has never done me any favors.
Anyway he did eventually respond (yeah LJay, I know...). He apologized for the late reply and is busy all week/weekend. To be continued... I really do appreciate all your feedback. I hope you all know this! :-)
08-10-2015, 07:40 PM
Camfer Wrote:Option #1 : Just talk to him. Ask him if he wants to get a drink sometime. If he says yes or even maybe then whip out your phone and get his digits right then and there.[MENTION=20941]Camfer[/MENTION] There I am, reading replies to this guy's question when I suddenly zero in on Camfer's response. "Nobody's better than Camfer at giving really laid back, good common sense advice," I think. So I read through option #1 , and nod in agreement. "Perfect advice. Proactive without being pushy. What's option #2 ?" I'm not half through it before I snort strawberry essence oolong tea all over my keyboard and screen. Even after the clean up I'm still noticing a spot on the screen. Thanks Camfer. I love the smell of my tea, but I don't love it enough to blowhole it through my nose. I'll be reading your stuff with caution in the future. [MENTION=22999]MFax74[/MENTION] You've been given, and it sounds like have followed the great advice people have given you. Well done. Reasonable self confidence is more attractive than timidity by far. Now the ball is in his court. If he texts you back in the near future, or you see each other in the hall, let him be the one to suggest a date. If not, let it go with the knowledge that you've been strong and taken the initiative. Now it's his turn. BTW, you mentioned that he knows your ex. Would your ex have said anything to sway this guy's opinion of you? Just wondering. xx |
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