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dry spell 3 years
#11
Honey,,, I've been on a dry spell that spans two decades!!! Have fun while you can, once your married all that good stuff between the sheets starts evaporating after the first 20 years...

I'm such a sad-sack. If I just hadn't thrown away my lucky charm 20 years ago,,, darn'it.............

It's time for one of those Country Western Songs,
Jimeroooooooooo
We Have Elvis !!
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#12
Happy birthday to meeeee!!!!!!!
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#13
Steve Wrote:Whether you like Liza or not, this song applies to you.




If you want to get laid put yourself out there, risk getting hurt, and find a man and have hot monkey sex. Make sure you have condoms and lube first. (It's good to be honest and Bette Davis knows that I'm a Trekkie too, but you might want to keep the Star Trek references to a minimum at first.)

Mdance2RideTwister

I shaked, rattled & rolled. Did everything but bang the gong.
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#14
wayward Wrote:Apparently I'm quite talented
My mom feeds me that line everyday..!

So tell us about the hookup.,.
Please..?
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#15
jimcrackcorn Wrote:Honey,,, I've been on a dry spell that spans two decades!!! Have fun while you can, once your married all that good stuff between the sheets starts evaporating after the first 20 years...

I'm such a sad-sack. If I just hadn't thrown away my lucky charm 20 years ago,,, darn'it.............

It's time for one of those Country Western Songs,
Jimeroooooooooo
How could you not have sex for twenty years and call yourself a gay man..?
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#16
Anocxu Wrote:How could you not have sex for twenty years and call yourself a gay man..?

Porn, Loads of gay porn
I am the angles that hold and surround you

I am the demon you're afraid to meet
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#17
I haven't had sex since the last millennium... After a decade it stops being a need sort of thing and your sex drive will give into the reality that there ain't none coming your way.

On the bright side, I don't have to worry about STD's or bad relationships, abusive boy friends, or tricks who rob me blind or waking up in a bathtub of ice missing a vital organ like a liver.

To every cloud here is a silver lining.
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#18
VirgoMasquerade Wrote:Porn, Loads of gay porn
No handshakes for you and Jimmy..

Virgo..
Weren't you hunting for someone to split open like a coconut?

Now don't get me wrong..
I was almost 25 when I had my first time..but after..minimum..at least twice a year..
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#19
Bowyn Aerrow Wrote:I haven't had sex since the last millennium... After a decade it stops being a need sort of thing and your sex drive will give into the reality that there ain't none coming your way.

On the bright side, I don't have to worry about STD's or bad relationships, abusive boy friends, or tricks who rob me blind or waking up in a bathtub of ice missing a vital organ like a liver.

To every cloud here is a silver lining.


Omg..
No.,
That silver lining should be the wrapper of a Trojan XL...

Your pole and hole are plotting against you as we speak..
How could you be so cruel?

You are such an awesome guy..
Go get some lovin'..
Before 2020?
Please?
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#20
Just to remind you all, this was my first time in the sack. He comes into my hotel room. I place a hand on his shoulder and he gives me the first sloppy kiss of my life. From that moment we can barely keep our mouths off of each other. He's tall and stocky with pepper hair, old enough to be my father. By the time We're both undressed I push him onto the bed and take his cock into my mouth. It is small by any normal standard, but I am grateful. It is pleasing to the eye. He doubts repeatedly over the two hours that this is my first time. I move my mouth up and down his body. We pull each other into heated kisses.


This story isn't done by far. I'll just have to fill in the rest after my shift. Expect more around 5:30pm Eastern time.
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