Dating experience

[rianhezar]

Hey gentlemen..
Im new to this forum site but I'll try my best to learn things here..
Okay so yeah I'm your gay brother from South-East Asia and I like to be "rianhezar" is my name here. I love design and my work are all based on design, to be cleared its more to digital media kind of designs. So Im 21 years old and still searching for a true love and also I'm dating a guy right now.

Back to the main topic, so have you ever experienced that you feel so close to someone you like and do anything you can to be close to him until you get what you always wanted which is respond. For a couple of weeks you will be the happiest person on the planet and you and your partner would be together always and hard to not see each other even just for a day. Time goes by and you realise after the 5th week or we can say the next month or maybe less that we are doing the same thing everyday over and over again (Meet, kiss, cuddle, kiss, cuddle, speak, kiss, cuddle, sleep. goes forever). Then we start to feel like life is so boring and what have we achieve for the last one month. We feel like a useless person that is stuck to the same routine everyday. And then the feeling towards the person you love seems to fade away because all you talk about is the same thing over and over again each and everyday. I never like this kind of relationship. Its so empty and hollow. I don't believe that with love we can survive. love is boring without activity. So the thing is, is it only me feeling this way or I met the wrong guy?

Please share your thoughts gentlemen...

[valkyrie4488]

Welcome to GS. I can understand, but my advice may not be that good sense I haven't been in a relationship yet though I hope to meet that special someone. I would think though the best way to keep thing's lively is to be spontaneous. Surprise your guy, or maybe plan some romantic scenario's. I hope this helps, and again welcome.

[jimcrackcorn]

Relationships are just like friendships when it comes to activities outside of the bedroom. You go out and do things together,,, enjoy each others company and companionship. You share your lives together throughout the exciting moments and the mundane moments.

Getting bored of your relationship - usually kicks in after you've been together for several years, it's often referred to as the 7 year itch. It usually shows it's ugly head when you feel that even the sex is becoming boring and mechanical. When your everyday interactions between each other become monotonous.

Your in approximately the 5th week of this relationship and you are bored by the routine you two have developed (kissing, cuddling. speaking, sleeping)... I assume you mean your having sex when referring to "sleep",,,, if your not having sex, then what's preventing you?......... What are the two of you doing together besides the kissing, cuddling,speaking, sleeping? Are you going out shopping together, seeing movies, playing games or sports, eating at restaurants together,,, etc. Are you planning for your futures together?

While in long term relationships, there will be periods where you will get bored of each other. This is just what happens between two people who have been together for a long time,,, and you find ways to move forward and keep each other happy. However,,, your relationship is quite young, and this shouldn't be happening at this early stage. So,, you two need to put on your party hats and start enjoying life together,,,,,, go dancing,,, get a little tipsy,,,, enjoy yourselves!!!!.

Sincerely,
Jim

[IanSaysHi]

^What Jim said. You've got to do other things together. Hace you been to every kind of restaurant in town yet? Have you been to a theme park together? Have you discovered who's best at Mario Kart? Have you tried cooking together? Have you been walking together somewhere new? I bet you don't know yet everything he likes AND dislikes.
Also, it sounds like you've spent every day together. Are you spending time apart with your individual friends too? Sometimes being apart helps. You need to have a life of your own as well as with him.
Good luck!

[rianhezar]

Thank you everyone for your advices, it really opened up my mind towards a relationship. I hope he would like me as the person I am not just the one who is in bed. I'll update things what happen next..

[Scootaloo]

I found when things get too routine, it's usually the end. But I don't know what the real thing is, or else I wouldn't be single.

[meridannight]

i would argue that a relationship doesn't really ever get boring. yes, it adapts to a certain routine, some of the novelty will wear off, but i wouldn't actually qualify it with the word 'boring'. i can be with one and the same man for years, and his body will still be exciting for me to explore and play with. our conversations will still be interesting and stimulating, because of the underlying way either of us approaches any one subject, bringing his own personal bias into the topic. we are constantly learning new things and trying things we've never tried before -- how can this be boring?

i can also appreciate the more quiet times. there are those. at times, things cool down for a while, but that doesn't make it an occasion for panic or inventing things to do. not everything has to be in constant motion all the time, you don't always have to be 'doing' something, in fact. and then there's still things always happening on a monthly basis that will inject thrill into life. and if you sometimes get tired of or used to the other's presence -- go and do something away from each other. you don't have to be glued to one another on a daily basis. take a week off. go to Paris alone. and, if it does go into a routine too much, i also know how to get out of it. the world is truly infinite for two guys to make a life with each other.

this being said, being bored after mere five weeks, might be more symptomatic of there having been more sexual lust between you two than actual relationship potential. or maybe you're panicking for nothing. some guys have personalities that do get uncomfortable with 'silence', when there doesn't seem to be that much 'action' happening. maybe you're like that.

[Beaux]

Just my opinion, but I suspect that your "boredom" proble, has more to do with your age and your youthful hormones than it has to do with the guy or your relationship with him.

Your not really ready to settle down yet, imo.

~Beaux