Update on My Feature in Men's Health Magazine - January Issue

[trywait]

Thanks Bhp91126 and PA for the kind words.

Sorry for the late reply as I no longer that active in GS.

If I may, I would like to give a bit of update on myself.



I think a few people in GS are aware that I had issue with my face as in accepting it. After extreme weight loss, my face was heavily criticized by many parties from my own family, relatives and friends. A plastic surgeon and a head nurse from two different hospitals even suggested me to do a face makeover by inserting cheek implants and facelift. These people drove me nuts. They discouraged me and in the end, I avoided looking at myself in a mirror for many years because I dislike my face so much. But deep down, I believe that I have a nice looking face but my mindset has been planted with negative seeds from people around me. It took me long years to fight and overcome it.

Today I can tell you that I have overcome that mindset. I'm not fully recovered but I'm doing okay. I don't need anyone's acknowledgement and opinion on how my face should look like. I believe and I know that I have a good looking face. I love my face. That's good enough for me.

My left leg injury. Another reason why I used to hate seeing myself in a mirror or see myself walking down a street. The permanent injury is visible thus few people thought that I'm disabled although I'm not. A guy even asked me if I'm a Paralympic athlete. The injury used to make me ashamed of myself. I had a very low self esteem but I didn't give in. I fought back to overcome the lack of self esteem.

Nowadays, I challenge myself and the public by wearing shorts in public; showcasing my injured leg. It helps to train my self esteem. To hell with what people think.

With everything that I went through, I actually thought guys wouldn't be attracted to me. But I was wrong. I was approached by many. I was honestly surprised. I concluded that these people like my confidence. I don't sulk and surrender to my 'weaknesses'.

I think the lesson is confidence attracts people. You don't need to be perfect or look like a model in a magazine to be liked and accepted by anyone. Just be you. Be confident and be positive. Some of my colleagues consider me as a weirdo and the odd one because I'm wacky, love to goof around and a bit weird (living in my own world that my boss keeps joking around that I come from Mars while others are from Earth). But I don't mind because I love my personality.

But in the end, I'm still single. While I don't mind accepting a man into my life right now, my main focus is to elevate my physical as I still have few more surgeries to go. I really would like to finish my surgeries before 35.

Additionally, I would like to strengthen my career and financial background.



I turned 33 on last 16th April. Looking back, I'm very happy with what I have achieved. I overcome bullying in primary and high school, I went through extreme weight loss, I went through multiple loose skin surgeries, I overcome social anxiety, I overcome my leg injury and face issue and last but not least, I also bounced back from a depression, which happened in year 2014.

I still have so many things to do to prove to myself that nothing is impossible. Have faith in yourself and you can pretty much do anything.

Thanks again to everyone for supporting me all this time.

Best wishes.

you rock jay! and live your life the way you want to! you're in charge of your own happiness!

[Cridders88]

You are an inspiration [MENTION=21041]Jay[/MENTION]. I love that you have turned your life around and turned those negative comments into a positive thing. Happy to hear you are doing well and I hope you reach the rest of your goals. I have no doubt that you will

[Bhp91126]

I'm very proud of you. I admire how you turned your life around and turned weakness and bullying into strength and determination. On top of that your self confidence has become so strong that you do not need other peoples validation anymore. You are a real catch and I hope you meet a man worthy of you.
Great big hugs

[Insertnamehere]

[MENTION=21041]Jay[/MENTION] with the kind of determination you've shown, those goals will be tackled thoroughly, that's certain. Go for it.

[Jay]

I was thinking is it okay if I create a new thread, which acts as a journal where I can share my fitness journey and my life? My goal is to encourage and support each other in GS. I just would like everyone to know that you can overcome difficulties if you give your everything.

But at the same time, I kind of hesitate to create such thread as I don't want people to think that I'm showing off or such. That is definitely not my intention. Honestly, I kind of embarrassed for updating this thread too.

Anyway, uh...as my last post for this thread.

Besides my usual workout, I am actually doing two additional workouts.

I'm preparing myself for my second 10km long distance run, which will be held on next August. It's under Standard Chartered Marathon. I do a tailored-cardio plan where I have to train myself running (Interval training) three times a week.

I also decided to support a friend of mine who wants to do 30-Day Squat Challenge. It begins with 50 squats on the first day and ends with 250 squats on Day 30. But I did a mistake though. I thought the 30-Day Squat Challenge requires weights so I do mine with weights. We both thought my mistake was funny. There's no turning back so my friend does his without weights and I do with weights. I'm fine with weights; I separate my reps into sets. Training legs happened to be my favorite workout and I love to do Back Squat and Dumbbell Lunges.

I'm tired, yes, because my schedule is packed but I'm very happy. I wish I have more free time so I can push myself harder and make my workout more intense than what it is now.

Training shoulders at late night



Training Chest at 11.30pm the other day



30-Day Squat Challenge (50 squats) yesterday



Leg Day today

I warmed up with 10-min on treadmill and 2 sets of Barbell Burpees. Then proceeded to do the 30-Day Squat Challenge (55 reps) and then continued with Back Squat with heavier weights for 4 sets. Then the workout goes on ... Dumbbell Lunges, Hip Barbell Thrust, Leg Curl and so on. My legs wobbled in the end of training but I'm so happy.

I jot down my progress in a book, which I carry it with me all the time.



Speaking of working out. I often get this comment, "...You're not enjoying life to the fullest because you're spending so much time working out and watching your dietary. You life is so restricted." But is it?

On last 2012, I was admitted into a hospital for a surgery. I shared my ward with these two amazing disabled kids. Both of them were scared to talk to me at the beginning because I was so quiet. Until one approached me.

They discovered my story; my weight loss and how I overcome my leg injury. The two kids, one of their moms and I spent the whole night sitting on my hospital bed sharing stories and laughing together. These kids want to know my stories as many as possible.

One of them asked permission to hold my hand. I asked why. He said he wants a bit of my spirit so he can get through with his life. The same kid then offered his burger that his mom bought for him to me. "Please Jay, you can get back in shape after surgery."

These two kids see me as their big brother. They called me their hero...because I overcome the impossible. I still keep in touch with them.

To help others indirectly with their lives by fighting and overcoming my own is meaningful to me.

So back to people's comment; How am I not enjoying my life to the fullest?

I'm very proud of you. I admire how you turned your life around and turned weakness and bullying into strength and determination. On top of that your self confidence has become so strong that you do not need other peoples validation anymore. You are a real catch and I hope you meet a man worthy of you.
Great big hugs

God, Bhp91126...I really hope so. I really do. I hope to find that man who understands what I went through and can accept my flaws and all. Thank you for the kind wishes.

[Insertnamehere]

I'm assuming the people who know you won't think you're showing off [MENTION=21041]Jay[/MENTION]

Recetly, someone started a thread more or less asking for advice not on what to do, but to how to keep up with excercise and healthy food choices.

[princealbertofb]

[MENTION=21041]Jay[/MENTION], you are an amazing person. I think all that old you was just you trying to protect yourself the best way you could, until you found the way to express who you really are, and how you really wanted to be. I hope those days of being unwell are behind you for good. I don't know how your mother can't see what it took for that exceptional transformation. Whoo-hoo, Jay, you definitely rock.
BRAVO!!!

[princealbertofb]

Jay, I'm not sure you need those cheek implants. Maybe this is the one area where you don't really want to go. Your face will age gracefully the way it is... and it should be so. I understand that you need a few tucks here and there for the rest of your body, since you've lost so much weight, but unless you really don't feel comfortable with your new face, just let it be. We change as we grow older, and cheek implants will just look weird a few years from now. And then it'll be time for more surgery and more surgery... It just never stops. Financially costly and not always the best results in the end. Learning to grow older is what it takes to be happy. Please, instead, go out and find that man, the one who can love you for what and who you are. It'll be worth every surgery.

[princealbertofb]

Oh, and Jay, remember that little video you put up for us once where you were dancing in your office, or some place like that. I thought you had such sexy moves, I don't see how the right man wouldn't fall for you.
So here's one for you to work out to...


You may even like the way these actors do it in this film...


I find Ryan Reynolds quite funny, in the way in enjoys this song and does his little dance...

[Jay]

Jay, I'm not sure you need those cheek implants. Maybe this is the one area where you don't really want to go. Your face will age gracefully the way it is... and it should be so. I understand that you need a few tucks here and there for the rest of your body, since you've lost so much weight, but unless you really don't feel comfortable with your new face, just let it be. We change as we grow older, and cheek implants will just look weird a few years from now. And then it'll be time for more surgery and more surgery... It just never stops. Financially costly and not always the best results in the end. Learning to grow older is what it takes to be happy. Please, instead, go out and find that man, the one who can love you for what and who you are. It'll be worth every surgery.

PA, don't worry. I have no intention to alter my face by inserting cheek implants and doing facelift. It did cross my mind few years ago as it was suggested by many parties but that was then. I was still having problem to accept my appearance as in physically as I was hugely criticized by people then. My mind is not fully 'cured' but highly recovered.

I actually love my face as it is. It's not perfect but that's the great thing of it. The imperfection gives a sense of uniqueness.

As time goes by, I realized my instinct was right all along. I wasn't unattractive or ugly as some have said. Kind words that I received from strangers to friends and also few GS members on my looks double confirmed my thoughts.

Few guys and girls have said that I'm um, pretty but I think that's quite overly generous of them. While I appreciate their very kind words, it would make me a happier man to be known as the guy with a pretty heart (hopefully) than a pretty face.

I've expressed my thoughts to my mom regarding to her comment on my face; on how it affects me. She didn't take it very kindly but it's okay. At least, I've expressed my thoughts. My mother and I are still having a good relationship. I can't pull a sour face at my mom because I'm a grown man, she's still my mom and she's being a mom.

Please, instead, go out and find that man, the one who can love you for what and who you are. It'll be worth every surgery... I thought you had such sexy moves, I don't see how the right man wouldn't fall for you.

Frankly, there are several guys that are giving me signal especially in my gym but I just smile at them. I will say hi and be friends with them. I think this is the best way to know them well; their characteristics, intention and sincerity. I really hope one of them is that guy; the one who can accept me as it is - with flaws and all. In return, I will give him one hell of a lap dance. I kid. In return, I will give him my sincerest love and loyalty.

Thanks for the videos, PA. Pleasantly surprised that you still remember my old video, PA. Thank you, PA. Hugs.