Are things moving too fast?

[Doc]

Do you think he's worth the risk? If you really like him take a chance. He's cuddly and handsome, is he your dream guy? If he wants you to meet his parents I think that's great, it means you're more to him than just sex. If I found my dream guy I'd come out right now, haters be damned. You're young jump in with both feet, que sera sera.

[NativeSon]

Wonder what he said that he deleted?

All I can say is if you don't like being tickled then don't let yourself be tickled.

[kindy64]

[MENTION=24135]Cagliostro[/MENTION] it says you are a "Gay Man in a Monogamous Gay Relationship" If that's what you are stating you have, then he is your boyfriend isn't he.

So, it's impossible to tell, but I would propose that your boyfriend knows your situation and is giving you a place to spend Christmas so you aren't alone. You've already met the family so I would consider it a low risk.

Only you can decide though. Do make sure you have an honest conversation with him about your feelings, fears, and where you think things are right now. You don't want to get in a situation where he's introducing you as his future husband quite yet.

[Cagliostro]

I keep trying to post but I get a message that says it has to be approved by a moderator first before it gets posted, it never gets approved hopefully this one will go thru.

He is definitely not needy or clingy, he never minds when I spend tie alone with my friends of both genders, he definitely gives me space.

When we're together he can be very intense, always kissing, whispering "sweet nothings", but I really like that it makes me feel special and loved.
I just worry that maybe it's too good to be true, a gorgeous hunk is showing me with love and affection,I'm just a regular guy.

I want to go home for Christmas, I love Christmas in New York, the Rockettes, the Rockefeller Christmas tree,
I see the NYCB Butcracher Ballet every year, not to mention my family.

I can't afford to go because I waited too long and plain tickets are prohibitively expensive
My mom just wants to charge everything to her credit card, but that would put her in debt,
So it looks like I'm staying here.

My boyfriend got us tickets to see "The Nutcracker" at The Royal ballet (I think it's covent garden but I could be wrong.
He's introducing me to all these cool British traditions, like we got poppers (I'm not sure what they're called you break them open at Christmas time and it's filled with small toys like a paper crowns) I had never seen those before, we're also going to have Christmas pudding, which I've never had before.

So answer some of your questions:
Someone said that if I don't like being tickled, I shouldn't let him tickle me.
He doesn't tickle me like that anymore now that he can touch me in other ways.
Yes he's my boyfriend we established that, we're not just dating around (I've known him for a year now).

I'm terrified that I'm going to get my heart broken, cause it's like a dream come true having a very handsome guy be very into me
I've seen other guys flirt with him and give hims sexy looks, we were at a bar and some guy tried to flirt with him and he just kissed me and the guy went away, but I'm worried the next time something like that happens he'll be tempted

I'm really falling for him hard and that can be a scary thing

He's asking me questions about what I likeI can tell he's eying to find out what to get me as a Christmas present.
What do I get him in return?
What present do buy the family for Christmas?

[Darius]

They're not poppers, they're Christmas crackers. Poppers are something you should stay away from.

[Cridders88]

[MENTION=24135]Cagliostro[/MENTION]

It's hard, but you've got to stop thinking that this guy is a gorgeous hunk and you are just a "regular guy". This guy clearly is very much into you and clearly thinks you're gorgeous or he wouldn't be with you, keep reminding yourself of that. If you keep thinking that your heart is going to be broken or it is too good to be true because he is better looking than you, then this prophecy could end up being fulfilled.

I don't talk about this much, but in my last relationship I felt inferior to my partner; he owned his own house, had a much much better job than I had, could cook so much better than I can and seemed to be a lot more popular than me. This caused me to be a little nervous around him, as I felt I wasn't good enough for him. He picked up on this and told me to stop being so stupid, he liked me for being me, but I still could never shake those feelings, and therefore could never feel I could be completely relaxed around him, which then caused problems and then the break up of the relationship. I don't want the same to happen to you. Looking back, I realised my worries and concerns were just me overthinking and that material things, including looks, don't really matter if that other person is into you and likes you for who you are (like this guy says he does).

Easier said than done, but don't let your insecurities get in the way. Enjoy him, and trust him when he shows you affection. He likes YOU

[Darius]

I agree with Cridders (he's always right) especially about not overthinking the regular guy thing.
People are attracted to others for lots of reasons and not all of them are physical. So, move on from that.
When sex is intense, as you describe it, the temptation might be to move too fast. Cooler heads need to prevail. Everything about this guy seems to suggest he is a good guy, especially impressive is the fact he wants you to know his family and friends. I still think you need to work on being friends and getting to know each other better. Friendship will take you a long way in a relationship.

Not only do you want to love each other, you want to like each other.

Lastly, trust comes with time. You are afraid your heart will get broken partly because you don't know him well enough to fully trust him. It doesn't hurt to slow down a bit.

[Camfer]

[MENTION=24135]Cagliostro[/MENTION]. To get past moderation got over to the word games and post 36 more times. Then you are off moderation.

It would be helpful for us and for you if you would post what is great about you and why this guy likes you. Genuine self confidence is sexy.

Maybe relaxing and not giving so much power to your fears is going to help.

I think for a gift to your boyfriend, would he wear jewelry? Maybe a pendant on a thin silver chain that he could wear under his shirt? Something that is classy and shows your connection to him.

If you do end up at the Buttcracker Ballet I hope you post a video. So many of us would be interested! The last time I saw that was when the plumber fixed a sink drain. [sorry couldn't help myself]

[MikeW]

...
I'm terrified that I'm going to get my heart broken, cause it's like a dream come true having a very handsome guy be very into me
I've seen other guys flirt with him and give hims sexy looks, we were at a bar and some guy tried to flirt with him and he just kissed me and the guy went away, but I'm worried the next time something like that happens he'll be tempted

This is totally understandable. But I have to ask you, not to sound callose or uncaring, but so what if you DID get your heart broken?

LOVING someone is ALWAYS a risk. This is true regardless how "handsome" you think he is relative to you. It isn't even about THAT (how he looks or how you look). What it's about is who you and he ARE and how you are with one another. It's about how well you communicate, which doesn't just mean expressing your thoughts and feelings, but how well you 'listen' to and 'understand' one another in all the ways humans communicate (including touch and 'vibe'). Ultimately it means how connected you are and how much each of you values the other.

I'll go on to say, even if this is all just "perfect" (which it rarely is)... there's absolutely no guarantee that it will last "forever and ever"... no matter what either one of you thinks or says. I mean, for example, either one of you could get hurt, injured, even killed. Or something else completely unpredictable could happen. None of us know what the future holds.

What you have is what IS right now. And the question is, are you going to let yourself have it and enjoy it for as long as it lasts? So what if it doesn't last? Does that mean you shouldn't have enjoyed what WAS while it DID last? So what if we get hurt? Getting hurt is a part of living. We all get hurt one way or another -- and this is especially true if we try to HOLD ON TO what is fundamentally impermanent. All life is mortal.

I'm really falling for him hard and that can be a scary thing

Yes, it is. But why? Is it because you're trying to protect yourself from a harm that isn't even happening yet? Could it be that by attempting to protect yourself in this way, you're setting up the conditions for it TO happen? Like [MENTION=22727]Cridders88[/MENTION] said, a self-fulfilling prophecy? Could it be that your "fear" is actually a means limiting yourself, your own openness and intimacy?

What's the worst that can happen? Short of him being some sort of sociopath that has plans to murder you (and there's no indication of this from you so far); it looks to me like the WORST that could happen is that at some point in the future the whole thing falls apart and you feel the grief of loss.

Well, welcome to the human race! Many of us out here have loved and lost... and many of us don't regret one moment of it, even if we had our hearts ripped open. That's just the way it goes sometimes. But, you know? Love is so rare that when it's real, even if it doesn't last "forever," it is worth the pain of its loss.

[NativeSon]

As for a gift, I like the idea of silver jewelry. I don't normally wear any but if someone I cared for gave me a piece of jewelry, I'd be proud to slip it on.

For the family, you can't go wrong with a gift basket or maybe some fancy chocolates or confections. Ljay's tips in post # 6 were on point. A fun game could work very well (and help pass the time).

Best of luck.