02-05-2017, 06:47 PM
Hi guys,
It's been a while. I haven't been around GS because there are many things to sort out in real life. Hope everyone is doing well.
I just would like to share a little update on myself.
To anyone who knows me well in GS, I think they know that I struggled a lot in the past. In 2014, I had a depression due to my dad's health, career (I lost my job) and a broken friendship. It took me a whole year to bounce back from depression. And now, I'm better than ever. Going through depression helps me to become a better person; improved version of myself.
2016
Funny as I thought that I would have completed all of my surgeries by now. That was my goal in 2012.
In 2015, I went to see my surgeon as I would like to know the update of my last two surgeries. My surgeries have been cancelled and delayed a few times. According to my surgeon, I'm still on the waiting list at no. 7.
"...But even though you're at no. 7, it doesn't mean your surgeries will be performed on this year or next year. It will probably take another few years because we are giving priority to other critical patients like burnt patients and alike." He explained carefully.
I think he was able to see my expression changes from hopeful to disappointment.
I guess this is common procedure in a semi government hospital.
I was bothered by this but only for a while. Someone told to divert my attention to something else. Maybe other parts of my life can benefit from this. I've been focusing and worrying too much on the surgeries that I 'neglected' other parts of my life.
I still continue doing my weight training and eating healthily as usual. But I no longer wait for a telephone ring from the hospital anymore. I'm hopeful but I'm not holding my breath on it.
My last resort is to transfer my surgeries to another hospital. But most probably, the same thing will happen.
2016
I don't waste my time sulking on the surgeries, I do my best to fulfill my life with exciting things. It's a great time to rediscover myself.
So last year, I did something new; I took a week plus off from work to travel by myself. I'm a city boy so traveling all by myself outside the city to two islands back to back was a bit scary but exciting. I met other tourists from Germany, Japan and United States. And we become friends. At one point, we all traveled together. Then I departed from them to continue my single trip on those islands.
I also finally had the guts to learn to drive. I took a driving lesson (Manual) last year. I failed my first driving test. I retook driving test on the next week and passed it with flying colors. I have Manual and Auto driving license. I bought a car (auto). I had my first car accident; another driver hit the back of my car because she was doing something else. Anyways old story. I have been driving for almost a year now.
To Daz; I didn't get to chance to tell you that I was featured in the Men's Health magazine last year.
My weekly schedule is full with weight training and running. On Thursday, I do dance training in a dancing studio. On Saturday's evening, I do movie marathon by myself in a deserted cinema located behind my house.
Just like the previous years, I will be participating in a 10km long distance run on this March. It's not about winning. It's about recognizing my true inner strength and rediscovering myself.
Last year's 10km long distance run under the Standard Chartered Marathon was challenging and scary. My left injured leg was acting up badly for weeks before the run. Three weeks before the 10km run, I struggled to walk and to climb stairs for a week plus. But I'm known to be stubborn, I still came to the gym despite having injured leg with difficulty to walk.
I bought a foam roller to improve my leg injury. It helps a lot.
I was able to complete my 10km run. My injured leg cooperated well throughout the 10km run except on the last 200m. But I continued to run. I was happy to cross the finish line.
Last year, I also joined 100 Back Squats Challenge. I completed 100-Push Ups Challenge two weeks ago.
I also picked up my reading habit again. So last year, I read a lot of books. I don't have any specific genre but I have tendency to read history, mythology and also mystery. I read two books on North Korea, four books on the Holocaust, Jules Verne's A Journey to the Centre of the Earth, David Howarth's We Die Alone, Daniel James Brown's The Boys in the Boat and few others.
I'm currently reading David Grann's The Lost City of Z.
Status
I'm still single.
I have been approached by several guys in the gym and around my office area but I stepped back.
I've improved my confidence drastically but unfortunately I still hesitate to settle out with a guy because of my unfinished surgeries. I don't know what a guy's expectation from me especially because I'm not a regular guy. I mean, I was thinking ...what would a guy think if I take off my clothes in front of him knowing that I haven't finished my surgeries. I still have loose skins here and there .
I know it's a silly mindset and I hope I can overcome it soon.
I did say yes to a guy named Ken though. He is half Asian and half Hawaiian. We used to train in the same gym. Very nice guy. He approached me and asked me out. I said yes. But he suddenly quit the gym before we went out. He didn't mention about it and I didn't too. Few weeks later, my gym friend told me a video has been circulating in Facebook - about a gym guy humping another guy in one of the gym toilets. The video was caught by a gym staff.
I took a look at the video.
I recognized the guy. It was Ken with a twink.
Now it's understandable why he quit the gym in a hurry. He was still in the closet.
I stumbled into Ken few months later in a shopping mall as we live nearby. It wasn't awkward. I said hi and had a little chat with him. But I didn't mention about the video. Then I moved on with my life.
There are two guys in the gym saying hi to me now. I hope that I can find strength and confidence to give a relationship a chance.
2017
2016 was a great year to me but I hope 2017 will be greater. I would like to experience new things in this year.
By the way, I would like to take the opportunity to say million thanks to GS members particularly who knows me well for supporting me all this time. I appreciate your kindness.
Best wishes to our future.
Much love,
Jay
It's been a while. I haven't been around GS because there are many things to sort out in real life. Hope everyone is doing well.
I just would like to share a little update on myself.
To anyone who knows me well in GS, I think they know that I struggled a lot in the past. In 2014, I had a depression due to my dad's health, career (I lost my job) and a broken friendship. It took me a whole year to bounce back from depression. And now, I'm better than ever. Going through depression helps me to become a better person; improved version of myself.
2016
Funny as I thought that I would have completed all of my surgeries by now. That was my goal in 2012.
In 2015, I went to see my surgeon as I would like to know the update of my last two surgeries. My surgeries have been cancelled and delayed a few times. According to my surgeon, I'm still on the waiting list at no. 7.
"...But even though you're at no. 7, it doesn't mean your surgeries will be performed on this year or next year. It will probably take another few years because we are giving priority to other critical patients like burnt patients and alike." He explained carefully.
I think he was able to see my expression changes from hopeful to disappointment.
I guess this is common procedure in a semi government hospital.
I was bothered by this but only for a while. Someone told to divert my attention to something else. Maybe other parts of my life can benefit from this. I've been focusing and worrying too much on the surgeries that I 'neglected' other parts of my life.
I still continue doing my weight training and eating healthily as usual. But I no longer wait for a telephone ring from the hospital anymore. I'm hopeful but I'm not holding my breath on it.
My last resort is to transfer my surgeries to another hospital. But most probably, the same thing will happen.
2016
I don't waste my time sulking on the surgeries, I do my best to fulfill my life with exciting things. It's a great time to rediscover myself.
So last year, I did something new; I took a week plus off from work to travel by myself. I'm a city boy so traveling all by myself outside the city to two islands back to back was a bit scary but exciting. I met other tourists from Germany, Japan and United States. And we become friends. At one point, we all traveled together. Then I departed from them to continue my single trip on those islands.
I also finally had the guts to learn to drive. I took a driving lesson (Manual) last year. I failed my first driving test. I retook driving test on the next week and passed it with flying colors. I have Manual and Auto driving license. I bought a car (auto). I had my first car accident; another driver hit the back of my car because she was doing something else. Anyways old story. I have been driving for almost a year now.
To Daz; I didn't get to chance to tell you that I was featured in the Men's Health magazine last year.
My weekly schedule is full with weight training and running. On Thursday, I do dance training in a dancing studio. On Saturday's evening, I do movie marathon by myself in a deserted cinema located behind my house.
Just like the previous years, I will be participating in a 10km long distance run on this March. It's not about winning. It's about recognizing my true inner strength and rediscovering myself.
Last year's 10km long distance run under the Standard Chartered Marathon was challenging and scary. My left injured leg was acting up badly for weeks before the run. Three weeks before the 10km run, I struggled to walk and to climb stairs for a week plus. But I'm known to be stubborn, I still came to the gym despite having injured leg with difficulty to walk.
I bought a foam roller to improve my leg injury. It helps a lot.
I was able to complete my 10km run. My injured leg cooperated well throughout the 10km run except on the last 200m. But I continued to run. I was happy to cross the finish line.
Last year, I also joined 100 Back Squats Challenge. I completed 100-Push Ups Challenge two weeks ago.
I also picked up my reading habit again. So last year, I read a lot of books. I don't have any specific genre but I have tendency to read history, mythology and also mystery. I read two books on North Korea, four books on the Holocaust, Jules Verne's A Journey to the Centre of the Earth, David Howarth's We Die Alone, Daniel James Brown's The Boys in the Boat and few others.
I'm currently reading David Grann's The Lost City of Z.
Status
I'm still single.
I have been approached by several guys in the gym and around my office area but I stepped back.
I've improved my confidence drastically but unfortunately I still hesitate to settle out with a guy because of my unfinished surgeries. I don't know what a guy's expectation from me especially because I'm not a regular guy. I mean, I was thinking ...what would a guy think if I take off my clothes in front of him knowing that I haven't finished my surgeries. I still have loose skins here and there .
I know it's a silly mindset and I hope I can overcome it soon.
I did say yes to a guy named Ken though. He is half Asian and half Hawaiian. We used to train in the same gym. Very nice guy. He approached me and asked me out. I said yes. But he suddenly quit the gym before we went out. He didn't mention about it and I didn't too. Few weeks later, my gym friend told me a video has been circulating in Facebook - about a gym guy humping another guy in one of the gym toilets. The video was caught by a gym staff.
I took a look at the video.
I recognized the guy. It was Ken with a twink.
Now it's understandable why he quit the gym in a hurry. He was still in the closet.
I stumbled into Ken few months later in a shopping mall as we live nearby. It wasn't awkward. I said hi and had a little chat with him. But I didn't mention about the video. Then I moved on with my life.
There are two guys in the gym saying hi to me now. I hope that I can find strength and confidence to give a relationship a chance.
2017
2016 was a great year to me but I hope 2017 will be greater. I would like to experience new things in this year.
By the way, I would like to take the opportunity to say million thanks to GS members particularly who knows me well for supporting me all this time. I appreciate your kindness.
Best wishes to our future.
Much love,
Jay