Came Out

[Genersis]

Because there mindset about gay people IS childish sometimes.:frown:
When some people hear the word gay all thay can think is "Eeewww".
(I got De ja vu typing this post:confused: )
Good luck Steven, you'll need it to change your Mums opinion on homosexuality.

[James]

Some parents worry about what will happen to their kid, others worry what will happen when their own friends find out they have a gay kid, on the mother side alot of the nasty rumors about being gay make them scared for their child and they do not think rationally for a period of time. On the father side I believe the worst reaction is what will happen to my blood line, sometimes going so far as to disown and throw-out like yesterdays garbage. Here in the states we have organizations that work with displaced teens and young people who are also gay. I believe every nation in the world has people who care enough to make organizations like this possible, Jim

[woodchip50]

Good luck Steven, you'll need it to change your Mums opinion on homosexuality.

i wouldn't say you will need it!
its probably just that she doesn't know enough about it.
media spent so long only a decade ago just going on about how disgusting, promiscuous, HIV ridden and generally immoral the gay community is. and they had been doing it for years. and with all the anti-gay stuff pumped out from every leading religious church in the world nearly everyone was constantly told its wrong and shouldn't be done etc etc.
so atm she probably just has all these fears for you, and is worrying you're going to die young in a hate crime or from HIV etc etc.
you wont need luck to change her opinion. she just needs to look into it. find out how in several respects its just blown out of proportion. and that actually you're no more likely to get hurt by a guy than you would were you straight and hurt by a girl.

:/

teach her not to be ignorant and let her come to terms with it in her own way. she should come to see that there are more important things than who you sleep with. and it will work out eventually.

once ignorance is goten rid of only the few who are too stupidly proud and dogmatic in their views wont change them. and if we are honest its those people who hold the world back in their own decade. determined not to let our race continue into a new light.

*seriously shut up oly! this is turning into a political speech!*

*k*

[mr_21]

Sad to here this,

My mum was shocked and althou she was talking to me etc like normal she did not talk about me being gay when i first came out, i felt if i was shut off a little bit but once she spoke to her parents she was able to speak to me about it more.

I think some parents just need to speak to someone who they can trust in about you coming out. Sounds a little daft but it was the case for my mum, yet thankfully she is good about it.

Also i think we need to remember our parents was brought up in a different generation to us and for some it may be hard to accept at first, i mean your mums parents may have tought your mum that gay was criminal etc, as it was years ago. Obviously people should be open minded and get on and move on with each generation, but in reality that does not happen for everyone.

I hope it all turns out to be happy in the end.

If not i would try and discuss it with someone you know will understand your sexuality, maybe once your mum sees other relatives etc are ok with it etc and have no problems with you being gay that she will feel ok and accept it, maybe althou it silly she worrie that people may pick on you maybe and cause family grief, althou we know this is very unlikely maybe she just not fully sure or understanding it and maybe she is a bit insecure about it.

[matty7]

my mums never talked to me about it at all, i think she's under the impression that if it isnt mentioned then its not really true/happening/a problem - - not sure what word to use to describe it really, i did over hear her when my sister told her - she said she knew there was something wrong but couldnt put her finger on it - dont think she'd want her friends to know she has a gay son, which is funny cos my best friends mother is her close friend yet hes known for ever im gay n doesnt care so i bet she already knows 2

[marshlander]

...Also i think we need to remember our parents was brought up in a different generation to us ...

That may be so, but it's not much of an excuse. My children are older than most of the people who write on here. P.A.'s mum (80), even after having lost one of her gay sons, could not be more supportive. For example, every time she sees an interesting article related to a gay issue she photocopies it and sends us both copies. She is delighted her son has found someone who makes him happy. I don't think she always found it easy, but I couldn't wish for a more supportive mother-in-law!

[Steven]

Here's an update because I was upset when I posted the thread.

So far everything's okay, I havn't been chucked out which obviously was a big thing, but we havn't talkd about it since...suppose it's for the best

Day I Come Out
I came out to my mum yesterday, cuz she saw i had a love bite on my neck from a lad what slept over the other night She already KINDA knew, I was doing things with lads, and also knew that I was bi.

But she was proper upset, and even threatened to kick me outta the house. She said that she would have to tell the neighbours and family and what would she do.

Also she said that I shouldn't go outside with a love bite, when I'm hanging around a lad which looks so gay, because people might think things.

:| My mums ashamed of me, I don't know what to do

Just to top it of, I still have to tell my Dad, and I have no idea how he will react, she knew and she's still had a right go, what will he do!?!?!?

After the Day I came out to mum
I just went downstairs, and my dad said "why did you let him give you them love bites", I was completely stunned

He knows!!!!

I'm so happy, but atchually shocked he hasn't reacted. I would've never guessed that. I suppose he must've guessed

[mr_21]

I was worried with my Dad at the time, but he was the same.

He said ok and nothing else, then my mum told me that he said to her that he already knew anyway.

[fredv3b]

So far everything's okay, I havn't been chucked out which obviously was a big thing, but we havn't talkd about it since...suppose it's for the best

After the Day I came out to mum
I just went downstairs, and my dad said "why did you let him give you them love bites", I was completely stunned

He knows!!!!

I'm so happy, but atchually shocked he hasn't reacted. I would've never guessed that. I suppose he must've guessed

I'm glad things are working out for you. Just remember that blood is thicker than water. You're parents might not like the fact that you are gay, they might even be ashamed of it (although in time that may change), however you are still their son. That's not to say things will be all happy, easy, etc. its just that families have a tendency to stick together for better or worse.

[matty7]

hey Steven - i'm really happy that your dad is cool with finding out.

the best advice i ever got about telling people was from one of my best friends, to quote him -("give people more credit mate than u think") -i'd built my self up for rejection n even gave all my mates the option of not been friends anymore as i told them - every single one were happy for me although some were bit shocked to start with, infact their even protective of me with other people, to quote again,,.,i should have given them more credit than i did, i think thats what your finding out with your dad now n im pleased for you