That awkward moment when you find out your extended family knows

[Radbot42]

Came out years ago, told my parents they could tell whoever, and the told me that they told a cousin. (who is a priest). I figured no biggie. Fast forward to a few years and during a political argument (ugh) about gay's who voted for trump last weekend (how this came up I don't know). Anywho a different cousin said that I was gay (duh) and I kinda sat there thinking thanks for the heads up whoever told everyone. It was just a very awkward conversation that moment on because I wasn't prepared for it. My third cousin's wife then proceeded to steal me away from the conversation to help with her kids (thank Zeus! [I've decided to start saying this recently because I don't know how I feel about the capital G. but that's another story]) It really isn't a big deal because I don't care who knows. But I wasn't expecting it to spread since secrets like that tend to be kept. I do wonder who leaked it, but whatever.

[Matt608]

Came out years ago, told my parents they could tell whoever, and the told me that they told a cousin. (who is a priest). I figured no biggie. Fast forward to a few years and during a political argument (ugh) about gay's who voted for trump last weekend (how this came up I don't know). Anywho a different cousin said that I was gay (duh) and I kinda sat there thinking thanks for the heads up whoever told everyone. It was just a very awkward conversation that moment on because I wasn't prepared for it. My third cousin's wife then proceeded to steal me away from the conversation to help with her kids (thank Zeus! [I've decided to start saying this recently because I don't know how I feel about the capital G. but that's another story]) It really isn't a big deal because I don't care who knows. But I wasn't expecting it to spread since secrets like that tend to be kept. I do wonder who leaked it, but whatever.

Whoa, if that's the case then I wish I belonged to your family. There are NO secrets in my family - if I call my mom right now (10:30am here) and tell her a secret, everyone will know by noontime, including the cousins in Portugal.

[kindy64]

Came out years ago, told my parents they could tell whoever, and the told me that they told a cousin. (who is a priest). ... But I wasn't expecting it to spread since secrets like that tend to be kept. I do wonder who leaked it, but whatever.

You patently said it wasn't a secret, so you should have expected EVERYONE to know

[LJay]

Seems like the rest of the family may have gotten more used to knowing than you have. Practice relaxing about things like this and prepare to go with the flow. Try answering it with, "Yes, and..." continuing with the rest of the conversation. It will get easier as time goes on.

[MikeW]

[Cuddly]

It's only a big deal if you make it one.

Own it.

[Camfer]

...I wasn't expecting it to spread since secrets like that tend to be kept...

Nah, news like that tends to spread like wildfire. You're gay, everyone knows, good place to be.

[Jae]

I do care who knows, cause I am not sure I am; Gay or even Bi. I've been called a "Late-bloomer" as I was 56 before I enjoyed a sexual encounter with a guy I met on a local CL ad. I have met up with two other guys since then, but literally nothing happened, which was a bummer for me... Seventeen years ago I was married for 23 years, I never focused on mwm sex, but had fantasized about it. Today, women walk past me with their guys and look to see who their with; cute butts for sure, but I want to see what's behind that zipper.

Several months ago I responded to a post on a Google account that I had that unbeknownst to me was tied to gmail accounts. I am a Christian, I play Bass and guitar as a traveling musician where I live. After playing Bass at one of these events the worship leader comes up to me to ask me about my reply to the post where in I said "I like to suck and swallow." Needless to say when this worship leader saw this link from Google to her gmail account, she told her husband and then another friend of ours/mine. So my secret was out. Then a few others found out the same way. I didn't back down though, hit whatever was going to come at me head-on, allowing myself to become vulnerable to the opinions of others. But because I am not sure of my Gay/Bi sexual wants, no one other then these know, unless of course they have told others.

I wish I could just live a life without having a magnifying glass over me. I like the company of men, not sure why. I do like sex with men, not sure why. Any thoughts?

[Radbot42]

Nah, news like that tends to spread like wildfire. You're gay, everyone knows, good place to be.

If it did spread like wildfire they took forever to say anything. 2+ years

[CellarDweller]

just because you didn't know it had been spread, doesn't mean it wasn't being talked about.

Family gossip tends to spread pretty quickly.