Is Gayspeak Really A Safe Place?

[MikeW]

A "safe space" is something that has to be created and maintained. In the context of a forum, it is the responsibility of both the forum moderation and the forum participants.

Very well said, [MENTION=20941]Camfer[/MENTION] and right on point.

You've got to be fucking kidding me. Calling other gays "faggoty and feminine" in ANY context is just plain wrong. The fact that anyone here would consider it an "opinion" rather than the abuse that it is tells me all I need to know.

I'm with [MENTION=24520]Pyromancer[/MENTION]. I won't be back to this site again either.

[MENTION=24419]Matt608[/MENTION] So, you just give up? Rather than "owning" this forum as a place YOU want to be safe, you just cave? Rather than challenging [MENTION=24108]Doc[/MENTION]'s choice of words you just take your marbles and go home? IDK, maybe Doc has no idea how his words affect other gay men. Perhaps he's just a clueless self-loathing jerk. Then again, perhaps he's open to reconsidering how he expresses his opinions... learning WHY others take offense at his judgments and word choices.

I've been directly and personally attacked on this (and other) forums. I don't take it lightly. Yeah, I don't like it, but as I said above, to me a man's words say more about him than me. If he's attacking me personally, I call him on it. If he's abusing others, he needs to hear that, too. And if it persists, I just select the "ignore poster" option. I don't just give up and go away *unless* what is being expressed is closer to the collective opinion of a forum.

[TwisttheLeaf]

[MENTION=20938]Gideon[/MENTION] considers Gay Speak to be a safe enough site that he doesn't worry about me coming in here on my own, even on the days when I am emotionally vulnerable. That isn't to say there isn't an asshat or two here, just like anywhere else in the world.

I do agree that the quote you gave appears to be gay bashing. I don't know the context or the motivation behind the words, but.... out of context? They do appear that way.

I hope you won't allow one person's skewed opinion change your mind about being here. Just hit ignore on his ass if you would feel better not hearing their opinions, yeah? I had to do that for a couple of different people. One of them, I eventually unblocked. The other? Not gonna happen. Ever.

[matty7]

Doc - times are changing in the military , and yes i have served
gayspeak is like life - most people are so helpful and happy to pass on knowledge and advice , and others thrive on creating conflict , thankfully they are in the minority on GS, you can engage them if you love an argument as some do till they eventually leave or you can choose to move on to a post that peaks your imagination - its a personal choice , if you know which poster will upset you then ignore that person

[Doc]

[MENTION=24520]Pyromancer[/MENTION] Fine, you called me out I answered your challenge with facts based on my experiences, and that makes me the bad guy? Maybe you should get your facts straight before you decide you wanna go a round with me. I feel sorry for you that you cannot accept ideas that don't line up with your own. If you can't handle this, the world is gonna eat you alive, good luck buttercup you're gonna need it.

Im sorry that some of you guys need online safe space, Im sorry some of us here actually have real problems. Im sorry that I grew up in a crime and drug infested neighborhood in South Baltimore and my childhood was marked by nearly daily brutal fist fights and constant abuse. Im sorry that I went on to spent my first years out of high school fighting in war where I literally saw stray dogs eat body parts, and saw human beings blow themselves up. Im sorry that now every time I see an animal hit on the road, the sight on the gore on the asphalt sends me into a panic. Put into context my experiences seem so petty compared to the way I made you feel. Im sorry from the bottom of my heart. Assholes like me oughta just kill ourselves, right? Ooooh baby you breaka my heart


[MENTION=20947]MikeW[/MENTION] " it is full of judgement and has an undercurrent of anger"

Yes very much so, I feel this airman's actions might be cause for reprisals on other gay service members, and for what? 15 minutes of fame? its irresponsible.

[Scootaloo]

It's only unsafe if you take my advice on things, I mean why woulod you want to follow someone as unstable as me?

[Doc]

[MENTION=20941]Camfer[/MENTION] Im just trying to make it clear that this, at least to me was nothing but a stunt. Furthermore we live in world with consequences not some sort of idyllic workers paradise that these knuckleheads believe it to be. I believe this airman's action will be cause for retaliation from the other side. The Pentagon's public approval is nothing more than shameless pandering, and I find it distasteful. Its all fun and games until somebody becomes the victim of corrective rape.

[artyboy]

lol this time of the year again is it lol!?

[Emiliano]

When I saw this earlier today, I felt like it had the potential to be a very interesting conversation. It's kind of a microcosm for some much broader issues in society right now.
If only the people who were offended had enough fight in them to participate in it beyond just expressing their discomfort.

[artyboy]

When I saw this earlier today, I felt like it had the potential to be a very interesting conversation. It's kind of a microcosm for some much broader issues in society right now.
If only the people who were offended had enough fight in them to participate in it beyond just expressing their discomfort.

Because people are bored of talking about the same things and nothing happening.

[Emiliano]

Because people are bored of talking about the same things and nothing happening.

I dont know... gays in the military, repercussions of uniformed and out soldiers, what are safe spaces, how are they secured, what purpose do they serve, can we ever feel entitled to having them, freedom of speech and opinions, the use of in-community slurs, internalized homophobia, the diversity of opinion and experience within the gay community.

All of that sounds a lot more interesting to me than what goes on in the word games forum, which literally is people talking about the same things and nothing happening. Except there, no one is really asked to think critically, put out of their comfort zones, or reveal anything about themselves besides what they ate for dinner. Yet that somehow manages to stay a popular corner of this site.