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Is Gayspeak Really A Safe Place?
#41
Doc Wrote:[MENTION=21558]I think physical bullying is much different than online bullying. One of these things is not like the other, in one of these things you bleed.

Not exactly accurate. One makes you bleed from the flesh, the other from the inside in the spirit and emotions. Both, incidentally, are deadly, as they both carry extremely high risk of suicide for those being victimized.

They may not be the same, but they are still both damaging to others, and both bullying.

So... all in all? The moral of the story is don't be a bully, whether it's online or offline. Not just Doc, but anyone. Everyone. You just don't know what kind of damage you may be causing.
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#42
Well no ones going to jump out of your computer monitor and shank you if that's what you mean.

If you mean is it some sterile hive-minded ultra-lib manufacturing facility.
Then no thankfully it's not.

It's a forum, a place for open discussion. So long as he's not being abusive to other members there's no reason to get upset about it. If you see no value in his contributions just hit the block button.

I for one found his perspective very interesting although severely misguided.
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#43
I once read someone say thee were offended by something, and someone linked to I think a facebook page or similar where the word Offended was related to hundreds of what I would call visually obscene images - war scenes, crime scenes, etc etc.

"safe place" most likely would, in the case you mentioned fall under "offended".

We (you and I and a few others) are in America, a mythical land where it is ok to have the right to speech. Fred Phelps and his group had the right to speech which offended many, but to cut them off, to arrest them for their "message" is in my mind an offense to the basic rights and liberties as provided by the bill of rights.

What you quoted is, in my mind, a freedom, a right of expressing what one feels or things and doesn't appear to me to be stomping on the rights of anyone else nor does it pose a threat to anyone else here.

What the founding fathers failed to do is provide us with the right to hear or listen. We have the right to hear or listen to whatever the right of speech gives us. In this case if the words make you feel "unhappy" or whatever you have the right to NOT listen to the words, or read them.

An unsafe place to me would be a place where your name and address are logged to some Government or Basher Data base opening you up for personal attack in the privacy of your own home where a simply scroll or click of the mouse or tap would lead you away from the "offensive" material and where you had to literally hide under your bed, or run away to seek a place of sanctuary.

Frankly, anyone who uses the words of "hatred" is to me a reminder of just how far we have come in a really short time from the days where homosexuality was a real crime, or a real point where people could fire you, harrase you and do all manner of real damage to your life for your being gay.

To me its part of my life history here in the USA. I had to hide my homosexuality to maintain a job, I had to hide from bigotry, I had to suffer the slings and arrows of police officers who laughed and refused to help me when an ex was beating the crap out of me because their opinion that "Faggots deserve it" was a valid point. Today this type of thing is unlawful and illegal and any cop found doing such a thing is in for serious do-do.

Safe Place for any web-forum is up for debate. I have had one individual here who played serious mind games because I thought "safe" meant protected. It was no where in the arena of some silly primative comment, it was a serious set-up by a very sick mind.

I don't blame this place or the website owner for the lashing, I blame myself for being too trusting and allowing a human animal to get to close. MY BAD - not the bad of the policies and design of the website.
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#44
TigerLover Wrote:Well no ones going to jump out of your computer monitor and shank you if that's what you mean.

I for one found his perspective very interesting although severely misguided.


1.) That's sort of the point I was making. If somebody bullies you out on the street and tries to beat you up, you might get hurt. You could try running but they might catch you anyway and beat you worse.

But online bullying? I dont see the scenario where you cannot just stop reading and walk away. I dont understand this at all, but I'll just have to accept it and take you ya'll at your word.

2.) Thats how I feel about most of you, but it seems to me that in your eyes Im like a relic from a savage and backward time. I guess in many ways I am, and I follow a stricter code of conduct than most of you probably do. But that doesn't always make me wrong.
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#45
Doc Wrote:1.) That's sort of the point I was making. If somebody bullies you out on the street and tries to beat you up, you might get hurt. You could try running but they might catch you anyway and beat you worse.

But online bullying? I dont see the scenario where you cannot just stop reading and walk away. I dont understand this at all, but I'll just have to accept it and take you ya'll at your word.

2.) Thats how I feel about most of you, but it seems to me that in your eyes Im like a relic from a savage and backward time. I guess in many ways I am, and I follow a stricter code of conduct than most of you probably do. But that doesn't always make me wrong.


Online bullying is NOT happening here (in this case) what is happening is an exchange of words, cannon balls of whatever ideas/philosophies, etc.

Online bullying is where a person dogs another person over and over again and the person cannot or will fight back.

We here on Gayspeak are our own monitors. IF you were to do something beyond "normal" conversation one or more of us would flag your comments and most likely give you a gang bang..... :eek:

.... of comments, correction, etc. :tongue:

If you feel that something is wrong in that exchange then contact one of the older members who you feel would give you sound advice. Older doesn't mean wiser, and older doesn't mean one with 100 plus years... Older means one who has been on this site a year or so who knows how one little thread can lead to mass exoduses, wars and crap which have happened before.

And if you ain't feeling safe, come here and I will protect you Wavey:biggrin:Roflmao
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#46
[MENTION=12444]Bowyn Aerrow[/MENTION] I was just saying those other guys are scared. Im not afraid of anybody, not a single son of a bitch born to a woman.
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#47
Sucks. Based on my limited knowledge of them, I thought Pyro and Matt were interesting newcomers.

Oh, well.

At the same time I can understand why they would choose to leave. A supposed gay / gay friendly forum is the last place I expect to find homophobic sentiment so casually thrown about. And then the attempt to normalize it with excuses? Life’s too short for this.

It makes little difference to me that the sentiment wasn't directly aimed at any particular forum member, as I don’t think it’s a stretch to pick up on the underlying message. ‘Faggoty and weak and feminine and lesser.’ Same stuff we’ve all been hearing since forever. I mean, is this not at least a small part of why to this day so many people end up closeted well into adulthood or even in sham relationships and marriages?

It's all a little disheartening if you ask me.
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#48
Doc Wrote:@Bowyn Aerrow I was just saying those other guys are scared. Im not afraid of anybody, not a single son of a bitch born to a woman.

You, You're Your - is basically Y'all - enclusive of all.
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#49
I dont come to this site much anymore because im too busy. but I think this website is quite trustworthy. I even had a few trustable friends and shared my fb after talking for a time.

and some helped me a lot. and there are some users that you can easily trust just after reading their topics and comments. and there are few people that I wouldnt trust Big Grin and believe me they're gonna stand out for you to notice.
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#50
Well, when I say ''few I wouldnt trust'', I meant [MENTION=22821]NativeSon[/MENTION] but appearantly he changed a lot. what he says sounds logical now Big Grin

Sorry for this Big Grin
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