Confessions!

[Bttmsub34]

My confession is that when I was young, maybe 6 or 7, my babysitters older son made me suck his cock. Multiple times he would pull me in the garage and pull out his cock and tell me to put my mouth on it. I did what I was told. I don't recall him ever cumming. He once pulled me in his room, made me put my mouth on his shaft, told me to spit on it, and then made me turn around and spread my ass. He did not penetrate but only rubbed against the outside. 

I do not know if this is what made me the way that I am. I don't feel traumatized. But I wonder if those interactions are the reason I want to be used by other men. I've been married to my wife for 9 years, I have had multiple affairs with other men. I have always been a submissive bottom, mainly sucking but have received anal a few times. I always feel guilty about cheating but I can't help it. I keep doing it. Sex with a man is in it's own universe compared to straight sex. She does not know.

If anyone has a similar story, not the first part, but has a wife, or if you like to talk to submissive bottoms. Message me, reply or something!

[Bttmsub34]

I would certainly love to share my first voluntary experiences.

[ChadCoxRox]

Well, so I come from a perspective of mental/behavioral health recovery so I can't help but perceive your confession from this point of view. So just how old was this "older son?" That kind of very young experience can certainly fuel psychological titillation which will be reinforced for likely lifetime stimulation. The course, purpose and value of that process is very tightly connected to the continuum of acceptance (like and dislike) of the experience. I hope it's been a positive, fun, and enjoyed experience for you, but in my experience it is often related to more negative adjustment in behavioral health practice. I've definitely experienced a few positive outcomes while the majority tend to struggle with cognitive dissonance, often effecting informed decision-making. This basically means we might choose to think/feel/do things we do not even realize we are actually choosing, with varying results. Sharing for the purpose of exploring how this influences, pleases or discourages your living in the here-and-now is my biggest interest.

[GJR78]

I understand how you feel. I was 13 it was the second time I saw another dick and gave my first blowjob.he was much older than me. In my case I wanted to do it. And he did cum a lot. As to your experience I was 9 almost 10 I walked in on one of my uncle's masturbating in our bathroom. I still remember how huge his dick looked. It curved up like a banana and was dark with a purple head. I walked in right when he got there because the door creeked,he looked over his shoulder and just kept going he started jerking off faster and turned towards me. He let out a moan and said"you wanna see it?" I just stood there like two feet from him as he moaned and groaned. I just stood there
I mutters something like "damn that hot."

He muttered through his groans "yeah it's cum I'm cumming." After he was done he just pulled his pants up and left. I remember looking at all his cum all over the wall behind the toilet. I asked him a little while later why he didn't tell me to leave or stop. He said "cause I was there when you walked in." The nest night I was woken by noises I go down our hallway to the living room to find him naked in the recliner. Approaching from the back when I got closer I saw he was naked kneeling in front of him was a women whose tits he was holding and fondling her head was bobbing fast up And down. I walked around the side,she saw me and stopped he looked at me then her told her to keep going so she started again. What I saw next led me to give my blow job my first one a few years later. I watched in amamzment as his huge cock disappeared into her mouth. What I now know is deep throating.

He told me after she left she was a hooker. So yes my young experience certainly influenced me.