Please help me
11-02-2009, 06:42 PM
I feel a great deal of respect for you and I will tell you why.
1.You have suffered a great deal in your life and you are working to overcome the major problems you have encountered in the past. That takes guts and I admire you for that.
2.I am sure you have doubts about the future but I am sure you will succeed in the end. Learning from mistakes and negative experiences is not easy but it does make you much stronger. I respect the fact you have stuck with it.
3.As Amanda said, you have done something really important to stop the cycle of abuse. That is amazing.
4.You are clearly a caring and loving person and there is so much that is positive and good about you.
You talk about an incident with your cousin. Giving a blow job to a cousin does NOT qualify as incest. Heterosexuals can marry cousins but they cannot marry brothers or sisters, mothers or fathers. THAT would be incest. In fact I am sure that quite a lot of brothers and sisters have sex together when they are young but in my heart I feel sure that all sex which is not abusive is an expression of love and is fine. There are of course biological reasons why brothers and sisters should not have children but even this is a biological issue not a moral issue. Two male cousins who want to have sex together are not going to produce children, so there is neither a biological nor a moral reason which should prevent them from enjoying themselves. Somebody or some people in your past have made you feel guilty about sex. THEY are the guilty ones, not you. What they did was really unforgivable. Now unfortunately you have to unlearn all that crap. I wish you much better luck in the future.
1.You have suffered a great deal in your life and you are working to overcome the major problems you have encountered in the past. That takes guts and I admire you for that.
2.I am sure you have doubts about the future but I am sure you will succeed in the end. Learning from mistakes and negative experiences is not easy but it does make you much stronger. I respect the fact you have stuck with it.
3.As Amanda said, you have done something really important to stop the cycle of abuse. That is amazing.
4.You are clearly a caring and loving person and there is so much that is positive and good about you.
You talk about an incident with your cousin. Giving a blow job to a cousin does NOT qualify as incest. Heterosexuals can marry cousins but they cannot marry brothers or sisters, mothers or fathers. THAT would be incest. In fact I am sure that quite a lot of brothers and sisters have sex together when they are young but in my heart I feel sure that all sex which is not abusive is an expression of love and is fine. There are of course biological reasons why brothers and sisters should not have children but even this is a biological issue not a moral issue. Two male cousins who want to have sex together are not going to produce children, so there is neither a biological nor a moral reason which should prevent them from enjoying themselves. Somebody or some people in your past have made you feel guilty about sex. THEY are the guilty ones, not you. What they did was really unforgivable. Now unfortunately you have to unlearn all that crap. I wish you much better luck in the future.
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