Sticks and stones...

[princealbertofb]

Indeed, but I don't think you have to be a member of that community to make those sort of comments. Just sensitive to / supportive of that community.

For example, a conversation between myself and a straight friend after buying a bag of apples:

Me: Do you want an apple?
Friend: I didn't think that was the sort of fruit you went for?
Me: They didn't have any bananas.

(Well, I thought it was funny)

You gave me a good giggle, Colin. Thanks!

[colinmackay]

Here is an expression I won't use about someone unless they use it to describe themselves because I feel it is somewhat pejorative: "Fag hag" - to descrive a (close) female friend of a gay man.

I don't mind "fag stag", the male equivalent, because the image of the stag is a positive one, compared with the image of a "hag" of being old and hackit.

However, I know some women that really like the title. Personally, I'd rather have a more positive phrase to use, but I've not found one.

[princealbertofb]

Make one up, Colin and we'll all start using it... start a trendy trend.
how about " a fag-won't-shag"?

[fredv3b]

A fagstag is a sexual opportunist he realises that single straight women tend to hang around gay men (although he cannot fathom out why, but then neither can I), so therefore all he needs to do is hang around with a couple of gay guys and women will come up and talk to him, without him even having to buy them drinks.

[princealbertofb]

or 'fag brag"?

[princealbertofb]

Oh, wait! ...
I know ...
"Ladies in waiting".

[colinmackay]

... single straight women tend to hang around gay men (although he cannot fathom out why, but then neither can I)

I think it is a perception of threat kind of thing. I'll give you an example that I think maybe fits. (I may have metioned this before)

I was at a dinner a couple of months ago and I was sitting next to a woman from the sponsor's company. I'd never met her before and she was from Michigan, USA. As the dinner was in Edinburgh the conversation turned to differences in US culture Vs. European/UK culture and eventually to evangelical christians.

I made a passing remark that I was glad I hadn't come out while working for my previous employer because my boss was an evangelical christian and he'd have probably tried to "pray away the gay" (His "hobby" was to stand in the middle of his town centre with a megaphone telling people they were going to hell unless they accept Jesus Christ into their heart).

What struck me most was that this woman's attitude towards me changed quite quickly and positively after that. She seemed to relax more and was a lot more open.

So, why single straight women hang about with gay guys is that they realise that they are safe and won't be a predatory target. (I think - I could be quite wrong, but it seems to make sense)

[fredv3b]

I think you are right, but that only explains why they prefer our company to that of straight men. However they also seem to prefer our company to that of other women, or at least some do, but why?

[princealbertofb]

It makes sense. It makes bonding with males a possibility without the threat, on an intellectual, emotional level which doesn't need to be made physical or sexual, although, I'm sure, there can be banter from both parties, but just for the fun of it.

[princealbertofb]

Oooh Fred, I think I know one of the reasons why. Women among themselves can be all "bitch", "scream", "throw hissy fits" and "bite", "scratch your eyes out"... and if they don't do it literally, they do it behind your back. The violence is real and it can be as hurtful, if not more so than male violence.So I guess some women prefer male frankness to bitchiness. We can really be the ideal middle man.