Hi guys, I'm pretty new to this forum and would like some help. As the question title says above, how does one enjoy anal sex? I have sex with my boyfriend and he obviously enjoys being penetrated, but whenever I try it on myself, I can usually get no pleasure and mostly just feel plain discomfort after a while. I've never inserted a penis all the way into my ass because of the pain and have just attempted to loosen the area first with plenty of lube and fingering, but most of the time I just achieve a shitting sensation when pulling in and out and that definitely isn't a feeling I associate with pleasure.
I've been trying very hard already to find a way to enjoy being anally penetrated. I've gone onto many sites, experimented countless times on myself, and recently even started inserting a toothrush end into my ass (I place a condom over the hard end [obviously not the bristly one] and reaaalllyy lube it up). While the last method seemed to give me slightly better results with regard to pleasure, after a while it just again became uncomfortable.
Is there any advice anyone here on gayspeak can give me? My boyfriend REALLY enjoys being penetrated, and I want to know how it feels too. I want to feel him thrusting me with me moaning in ecstasy and not pain and discomfort.
On a related note, my boyfriend tells me that the shitting sensation that I feel when pulling my finger in and out of my ass is the same feeling he gets when I thrust him, but he seems to be able to override it somehow. Or is that part of the pleasure?
I'm sorry that I won't really be able to give answers over the weekends as I'm currently serving in the army, so if any of you guys answer then, I'll come back to ya over the weekends yeah?
Thanks guys!
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While you're waiting for a useful answer I might just point out that some guys simply don't enjoy it as much as the straight world would like to imagine. Some men just get more out of doing other things.
If you're already trying things out on yourself to see if there is anything you particularly like, it sounds like you are doing what you can. I'm not convinced that a toothbrush is the best implement for your explorations (and I'm not going to ask whose toothbrush and whether they know what you do with it :eek: ). For a start, although narrow might seem a good idea, narrow and rigid sound a slightly risky combination, unless you know exactly what you are trying to achieve. Have you tried something designed more with the job in mind, such as a flexible dildo or maybe even a vibrator? People who enjoy anal penetration can be quite imaginative, but since enjoyable sensations sometimes include either or both the feeling of being stretched and direct stimulation of the prostate, shoving a toothbrush in and out might not be helpful.
Best of luck anyway, and welcome 
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I'd like to agree with Marshlander that you seem to be using the wrong tool. What might also not help is if you are allergic to latex, therefore a condom would irritate after a while? I'd also say that maybe you are not the person for anal sex, or maybe you need some more practice. There is also quite a lot to do with what angle and position(s) you can find. The wrong angle or position might hurt or feel boring whereas the right one would make it enjoyable. I believe that part of the pleasure is in your mind anyway.
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maybe try stimulating your prostrate rather then trying to insert somthing in your ass as far as possible . For me prostrate stimulation is what is most enjoyable . Try using a virbator , or better still start with a butt plug . Try just exploring what you like first and this may be completely different to what your b.f likes about anal sex .
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First, being a bottom is a preference of course. I'd say though that it's not initially a "wonderful" feeling. I have no problem with it, but others do. Have your partner go slowly. Also, try putting a finger in a condom and lubing it up and use that instead of a toothbrush. Then try the condom with two fingers inside it or try a dildo.
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see how these enjoy it and learn!
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marshlander Wrote:While you're waiting for a useful answer I might just point out that some guys simply don't enjoy it as much as the straight world would like to imagine. Some men just get more out of doing other things.
If you're already trying things out on yourself to see if there is anything you particularly like, it sounds like you are doing what you can. I'm not convinced that a toothbrush is the best implement for your explorations (and I'm not going to ask whose toothbrush and whether they know what you do with it :eek: ). For a start, although narrow might seem a good idea, narrow and rigid sound a slightly risky combination, unless you know exactly what you are trying to achieve. Have you tried something designed more with the job in mind, such as a flexible dildo or maybe even a vibrator? People who enjoy anal penetration can be quite imaginative, but since enjoyable sensations sometimes include either or both the feeling of being stretched and direct stimulation of the prostate, shoving a toothbrush in and out might not be helpful.
Best of luck anyway, and welcome
Firstly, it's an un-used toothbrush (don't worry mate!). Secondly, I think I might just try buying a butt plug, dildo or a vibrator then since quite a few of you guys have suggested it. The only thing I'm worried about is the feeling of these toys in my ass. I'm a total ass virgin and if a finger inside of me is already unpleasant enough, putting something like a dildo inside there seems like it's gonna be even more unpleasant..
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I know you probably feel some pressure to enjoy it, but if you don't you don't. It's your body and you can use or offer it how you want. Of course if your boyfriend is finding your reluctance difficult to handle that's an added incentive to make some progress, but ultimately it's your call. You're already using plenty of lube and trying to go slowly. Perhaps start small with the toys? Has anyone suggested anal beads? They are smaller still and might help you associate some pleasure with sensations you associate more at the moment with other bodily functions.
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KY makes lub with different sensations, butt, sorry, but I have found that enjoyment is differant for each person and only knowing that your partner is doing it for the enjoyment for you both and trying to picture that and the feeling when he cums may, (or may not), help to overcome the feeling you are experienceing. Don"t push it, it mey or may not come with time, but please only use items designed for the ass, not what ever is convenient, also their is info on line from doctors on this subject, Jim
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