Can't Get Him Out of My Head

[Anonymous]

Ok so there's this friend I have. Let's just call him D. We've known each other since my 2nd year in high school, his 3rd because he's a year older. We went to a boarding school and lived in the same dorm. We became pretty close over the two years that we were both there and I think of him as one of my dearest friends. I had a crush on D in high school, but I wasn't out and he wasn't gay so no one knew about it. My crush stopped when he went away to college.

Still, the next year we ended up going to the same college. I thought we'd get to hang out and be good friends like we were in high school but I barely saw him this past year and we only got to meet up for lunch a few times. (I hope you're still following this.)

Anyway, during our last lunch at the end of the school year I decided to tell him I was gay. He responded by telling me that he was dating a guy that he met online.:eek: Ever since then I haven't been able to stop thinking about him. It's been a good three months now and it's still going on. He's usually the first thing I think about in the morning and just about the last thing at night. And the thoughts aren't sexual like they were in high school. (sometimes they are but that's rare) He's just always on my mind.

Obviously I never really stopped liking this guy since high school. But still he has a boyfriend and there's no way I'm going to mess with someone's relationship. And even if they don't work out, I'm sure he wouldn't want to date me. I just want to stop thinking about him so much. What should I do????

[SlipknotRlZZ]

Meet someone online?
Maybe you should start a new hobby, try to change theway you live. Letting go is like a awfully hard part of love and I can only say that you should try to open your heart for the rest of the world.

[jimcrackcorn]

The best cure for unrequited love is to get yourself out there, start dating, and find a person who will love you back. There is someone special who's just waiting to meet a great guy like you, so put on a smile and go find him.

Happy Hunting,

Jim

[West_coast_Steven]

We've all experienced a feeling like this. Its hard to get someone off your mind if you have grown to like them. When I was younger I had a summer fling with a very good friend of mine, we had experienced a lot together, I got him to come out and say he was bisexual. So naturally we did things, and it was phenomenal, one day him and his family moved away. I thought about him for many years, and one day out of the blue him and his family moved into my complex. It seemed like a dream come true. We kinda said hi and hit things off where we had left off and began to date, and once again after about a year they moved away again. Now still to this day I think about him, he was my first real boyfriend. Now that I am older I still think about him and the "Fun" times we had together from time to time, but I don't let it get in the way of my life, sure I'm hoping that one day I run across him again, but until then I keep on living and not letting the feeling hold me down. So I would say, live your life and have fun doing it, if its meant to be you guys will be together. Let time takes it course.

[juk]

I think that often feelings are seen as something we have to bury or find a way to stop, well thats true of what may be seen as negative feelings.

Personally I would say allow yourself to experience these feelings, but in particular see what life lessons you can take from them. It would be very healthy and beneficial to look towards doing other things and keep your life moving forward, and I would expect these feelings to settle and find their own place within your mind.

Similar to what west coast seven said, I still think about, on an almost daily basis, about one particular special guy who has been in my life. In the beginning I would have done anything to have him back in my life, but over time as other things have happened and I have managed to make sense of our time together I reflect on the experiences we shared and appreciate them without the longing.

I dont know, I may be talking rubbish, but hey its one option and I am sure others will highlight other options for you mile:

[peterinmalaga]

I think that often feelings are seen as something we have to bury or find a way to stop, well thats true of what may be seen as negative feelings.

Personally I would say allow yourself to experience these feelings, but in particular see what life lessons you can take from them. It would be very healthy and beneficial to look towards doing other things and keep your life moving forward, and I would expect these feelings to settle and find their own place within your mind.

Similar to what west coast seven said, I still think about, on an almost daily basis, about one particular special guy who has been in my life. In the beginning I would have done anything to have him back in my life, but over time as other things have happened and I have managed to make sense of our time together I reflect on the experiences we shared and appreciate them without the longing.

I dont know, I may be talking rubbish, but hey its one option and I am sure others will highlight other options for you mile:

That's not rubbish juk, that makes perfect sense to me. Why try to forget something good? When I'm bored - on a long journey or waiting in a queue - I sometimes try to recall the good times in the past.

[marshlander]

Those last three responses in particular are pure quality. Thanks, Steven, Josh and Peter

Hope these make sense to you too, Anon. They speak very loudly to me.