*grumble* stupid love.. *grumble*

[Aria]

Woman, when did you realize that you truly were attracted to women? And have you ever been totally in love with your best friend? *Sigh..* I am currently and I don't know how or if I need to tell her.

She has a boyfriend, and so do I. I'm pretty sure she's straight as well. I've never asked because I was too afraid. She is so wonderful and caring and we even were planning our lives out together, though we included our boyfriends in the plan.

I hate that this is such a common scenario.. :frown:

Anyway, are there any women (or men) who can help with this?

Thank you!

[Jay]

Aria, sorry for the very late reply.

My humble suggestion, I think it's best to keep this crush to yourself. I know it is hard but you have to consider few things.

• She has a boyfriend and you don't know for sure if she's bi.
  
• You have a boyfriend
  

Even if she's bisexual, you highly need to consider with the fact that she already has someone now. I assume that she's very in love with her boyfriend.

So are you willing to take the chance to risk your friendship with your best friend for something that is very uncertain? Second is how about your boyfriend? Again, are you willing to risk your relationship with your boyfriend for something that is very uncertain?

From the way I see, the gamble is too high for your to play. You can lose your best friend as well as your boyfriend in this game.

[marshlander]

On the other hand, isn't that straight out of a straight man's fantasy?

[matty7]

late reply too, sorry.... i bet a large percentage of people start with boyfriends or girlfriends....doesnt mean their not gay - its just the done thing when your young the pressure to be just like your friends in couples = find the time to be alone with here and test the waters,,let her know in some way that you care more than just friends,,,the smallest thing can then lead to a more clearer hint until you can finally ask here how she feels about you 2 pairing up maybe - good luck

[marshlander]

Now that is a much more sensible answer than mine! Thank you, matty

[matty7]

wow - im learning the art of advice,,, thx marsh ,,,reading all the post on here is rubbing off on me

[inspiron1721]

how does your friend feel about sexuality? now if she's on the fence i would say certainly don't tell her...you could really damage your friendship and weird her out. if she's totally okay with sexuality i would 'consider' telling her. if this drives you nuts and she's okay with the gay lifestyle i would certainly tell her because you will feel better. it may or may not lead to anything but at least if she's okay with the gay lifestyle she will appreciate your honesty. i know this sound's horrible but i am more concerned about the gay issue then the boyfriend issue. being in a relationship say's a lot but not every relationship is black and white. meaning there's a lot of reason's people are in relationship's and not all of them are love and if true love presented it self then who knows. goodluck!