How to have straight friends?
11-17-2010, 10:15 PM
This is an interesting topic, with some very interesting responses. I however feel a little different about the situation. I have 3 close male friends. Over the years, 2 of them who I came out to have become very curious, and it is quite obvious. I think they wanted me to make a move. I used to mess with them and say, "You know you want to see what it's all about!" Both have admitted that seeing me and my fiance together makes them wonder because we are both masculine, and all they want to know is who is doing who. They have all but came out and told me they want to try something, but it's not happening. For one, I am engaged, and for 2, it would complicate our friendship. My other friend is totally straight, so I don't even have to worry about him. In my day I was known to "change the straight boys."
Now when I met my fiance, I thought he was straight, and he thought I was straight too. We were the best of friends at work, but we never really talked outside of the office. As time went by, I began to develop feelings for him, but I kept telling myself it could never happen for several reasons. He was too perfect! He was the most hansom guy, with the most beautiful brown eyes I had ever seen. We had so much in common, and he just seemed like a great person to me. So I told myself that he would be nothing more than my new straight friend. But as each day passed, I starting to fall head over heels for him. Finally, a mutual friend of ours came to me at work one day and said, "I can't take this anymore, and I think you need to tell him how you feel!!" I said, "Right! So he can knock my teeth out??" And my friend said, "as cool and down to earth as he is? The worst he will say is I don't get down like that." Needless to say, I wasn't going to open my mouth and say anything. One day a few weeks later, we were at lunch, and our friend set us up. We all sat down at the table, and he said he wanted to play a game called confessions. I knew where that was going, and I finally let go of the fear, and let the confessions roar! Needless to say, he told him right there that I liked him. When we found out about each other, there was complete silence. I felt so stupid for allowing him to out me like that! For the rest of the day, it felt weird. When he passed me, he asked if I would like to take a walk with him after work because this was very awkward. The rest is history! It's the greatest love I have ever known, and If I had forced our friend to keep his mouth shut, I would have never experienced this. Eventually we would have found about each other because we were getting closer by the day. But who's to say we would be engaged now???
So what I am saying, is sometime you never know if someone is straight or not. And just because they use the word "fag" doesn't always mean anything at all. There are hundreds of millions of homophobic gays, who will never let on to anything unless they are comfortable.
Befriending "straight" guys can be a full time job. You just have to be careful, and treat each and every situation different. There is no one right answer to this one.
Now when I met my fiance, I thought he was straight, and he thought I was straight too. We were the best of friends at work, but we never really talked outside of the office. As time went by, I began to develop feelings for him, but I kept telling myself it could never happen for several reasons. He was too perfect! He was the most hansom guy, with the most beautiful brown eyes I had ever seen. We had so much in common, and he just seemed like a great person to me. So I told myself that he would be nothing more than my new straight friend. But as each day passed, I starting to fall head over heels for him. Finally, a mutual friend of ours came to me at work one day and said, "I can't take this anymore, and I think you need to tell him how you feel!!" I said, "Right! So he can knock my teeth out??" And my friend said, "as cool and down to earth as he is? The worst he will say is I don't get down like that." Needless to say, I wasn't going to open my mouth and say anything. One day a few weeks later, we were at lunch, and our friend set us up. We all sat down at the table, and he said he wanted to play a game called confessions. I knew where that was going, and I finally let go of the fear, and let the confessions roar! Needless to say, he told him right there that I liked him. When we found out about each other, there was complete silence. I felt so stupid for allowing him to out me like that! For the rest of the day, it felt weird. When he passed me, he asked if I would like to take a walk with him after work because this was very awkward. The rest is history! It's the greatest love I have ever known, and If I had forced our friend to keep his mouth shut, I would have never experienced this. Eventually we would have found about each other because we were getting closer by the day. But who's to say we would be engaged now???
So what I am saying, is sometime you never know if someone is straight or not. And just because they use the word "fag" doesn't always mean anything at all. There are hundreds of millions of homophobic gays, who will never let on to anything unless they are comfortable.
Befriending "straight" guys can be a full time job. You just have to be careful, and treat each and every situation different. There is no one right answer to this one.
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Yesterday he was telling me a story, but i was completely lost in his Alaskan-husky piercing blue eyes as the sun was hitting them perfectly. It was pretty strange.. but they are mesmerizing. hahah. 