Help?

[Sui]

Ugh... well... I've got a big problem. And the sad thing is, I've been through this before...

I've got two guys. One lives in California, the other goes to my school. I love them both to death.

So... I'm confused... which do I go with? The guy in Cali is actually my boyfriend, but honestly... I'm getting so starved for love, that I feel like I need to break up just to save my sanity. On the other hand, this guy I know at school has pulled the oh so very evil "hmm... I'll decide sooner or later," and then hugged me...

So, any and all help would be -very- helpful.... because last time I did this, I got screwed over fierce. But part of me knows that I really should because it would be better if I went with someone closer to home!

Ugh... damn you conundrums... why must you confuse me so...

[sexyzackers]

brake up with the dude in california and go with the guy at your school. i don't complicate things. just get it over and done with!

[Sui]

Well, here's a run down on what went over.

Broke up with guy in Cali

Asked other guy out

Other guy said "Sorry, I'm going through hell. No, not now."

Talked with guy in Cali again, and he said "Probably better to just stay friends, maybe give it another try another time."


Aftermath: Me, sad, lonely, and depressed.


Love's just not my game it seems... though I'm an absolute addict.

[Shadow]

My take, for what it's worth, is that it is far, Far, FAR better to wear your heart on your sleeve and run the risk of being hurt than to deny others the chance to benefit from the obviously sincere love you have to give.

It does suck when you get kicked in the teeth, I know ... but by the same token, the good times must sufficiently counter-balance the bad for you to keep on trying ? I hope so at any rate, 'coz you seem like a really nice lad.

Long-distance relationships are always a pain in the butt. My b/f is in the process of sorting out his affairs so that he can move to Jersey (as I made it abundantly clear a number of times early on in our relationship that I had no intention of leaving here in the foreseeable future), but if he hadn't been willing to make that gesture, then we would have been consigned to a long-distance relationship as well, and whilst that does have its benefits insofar as you're both still very much your own people and can do what you want when you want within certain obvious boundaries (we're both big believers in monogamy, for example), the drawback is that, as you yourself have experienced, when you want to be close to him, it's just not AS possible as you might like - the end of a telephone can be a bit cool sometimes ...

HOWEVER, my advice for you is to take a deep breath, reflect on the positives of the situation, insofar as you have been able to break away from your long-distance relationship which was causing you dissatisfaction anyway, and that you can now look forward to bigger and brighter things ...

The lad that lives nearer to you sounds like he's got quite a bit of baggage at the moment of his own to deal with, so you might have found that turned out to be an "out of the frying pan, into the fire" situation as time progressed - however if you do want to have a go at being with him, then why not tell him that you're there for him if he needs or wants to talk to you ? Might that not be a good opener ??

Just a thought.

Hang in there kiddo xxx

!?!?! Shadow !?!?!

[Sui]

thanks for the advice Shadow, and you to Zackers (sorry I forgot to thank you earlier xD)

Turns out the Cali guy was just being mean to me... we're back together and I couldn't be happier. While the long-distancey thing is kinda annoying (for example I can't even friggin hug him in person >.<) I'll live. Patience is a virtue, and by god I'm going to be patient for as long as it takes for me to be with him! *prideful stance* among these acts I'm going to cure cancer and find a way to get rid of diabetes...

Inotherwords: It's not about to happen like I'm saying it is xD I know I'm going to end up going back into my emoness as soon as he's gone, and I know that I'm going to have to go through crap to find happiness... but atleast now I know how much worse it is without xD

Now, I escape into sleep and my many many fantasies... mm... log cabin time.. xP