Quick bit of advice needed

[stafford]

I havnt told anyone at uni that I'm bi, but recently things have changed with this guy.

At the moment its exam period and we barely knew each other all year, but I offered to help him out on one of the harder exams, and offer which he took up about a week later. Now, not only have we done the module twice, we spend half the time talking and laughing, not doing the work and working till early hours of the morning. He's the one usually to call asking to meet up even though his three flat mates are also doing the same exam...

But I can't tell if hes interested in me, the same I am about him, I keep overreading any sign I can that might suggest he does, like the fact hes overly excited about coming to my birthday even though he knows none of my mates...

Also over the last couple of times we've met up, he's rapidly escalated the number of stories he'll tried to include about hot girls etc and even if theyre barely relevant, kind of as if he's testing the water? Not sure, (just a pipe dream). Even though I'm 90% sure he hasnt gotten laid this year at uni (we're first year, everyone gets laid!) and whenever a fit girl walks in the room, he'll give her half a glance and no more...

Any advice/opinions wanted really.

Thanks x

[marshlander]

If you are enjoying his company work on the friendship. Don't neglect your exams though! Next time he brings up the girls thing ask him if there's something he wants to tell you! You could joke, "You're not straight, are you?"

[SlipknotRlZZ]

Try being a little more forward with him too and try some affectionate/sexual mini gestures, just to see his reaction. :]

[jbrowder24]

Focusing on friendship is a good place. Is he giving guys that walk in longer glances then? Will there be drinking at the birthday party? Perhaps you'll see his true colors, whether he's flirting with you or hitting on some poor gal friend of yours.

[dinokane]

I believe the advice that the previous members have offered is solid and worth noting. Yes, indeed, we've all had that experience and speaking for myself, even at this age, I still find myself doubting due to the ever and rapid changing zeitgeist and dating scene.

[flyboy]

What i usually do to test the waters is say a well placed gay joke and just keep it rolling till he gets some sort of hint or till the topic of conversation changes to something about homosexuality or things that attract him. It works really well for me cause, if he is gay, you find out about it and if he's not, you find out whether hes gay friendly or not. I make sure not to be too aggressive though cause that might freak some straight guys out.

[posterpicture]

You want to know about other secret then you have to throw out your secret first. Be open to people is the only way to get to know something deep down inside someone.

[Verbalocity]

You want to know about other secret then you have to throw out your secret first.

Exactly. You have to make a move, OP, if you want anything to happen.

Now, how much of a move is up to you. You can take the boldest route, which is to just flat-out come out to him as a bisexual. Or, as flyboy said, you can 'test the waters' and reveal your bisexuality to him bit-by-bit, at a slower pace.

Either approach may work...and either approach may end up disastrous.

For the most part, the outcome is out of your hands. He will react how he's going to react...if he's also gay/bi, he might open up to you in return. He also might not be ready, and remain firmly closeted. It's possible he's straight and could react negatively. It's possible he's straight and could react positively. It's possible he's gay/bi, but has no sexual interest in you. He might just be seeking a friend, and greatly enjoys your company (in which case its irrelevant if he's straight/gay/bi). And it's possible he may be as sexually interested in you as you are in him. mile:

In which case, you two will hopefully he having earth-shattering sex together by this time next week...but one of you is going to have to make the first move.

Sure, it's a little scary. But in my opinion, it's always better to know now than to wonder forever. Take whatever approach you're most comfortable with, and whatever happens, don't regret it afterward. Again, the outcome will be out of your hands. Your fantasy may not come true, but I doubt any nightmare scenarios will occur either. And even if they do? Well, you'll know he's not the right guy to be your friend and/or lover, and will no longer be wasting your time with him. You'll move on, and likely find the right guy (or girl!) all the sooner.

Fortune favors the bold. And there's no better time to apply that principle than at University. Be confident and uncompromisingly true to yourself. The people you want to gravitate to you...will.

And some will gravitate under the covers with you. mile: And when it ends up being one of the insanely cute boys responsible for giving you countless erections in class and study groups...as you fall asleep with him naked in your arms, exhausted and sweaty from a mind-blowing fuck...you'll be glad you weren't timid. :biggrin:

Keep us updated, ok?

[rakmatis]

And when it ends up being one of the insanely cute boys responsible for giving you countless erections in class and study groups...as you fall asleep with him naked in your arms, exhausted and sweaty from a mind-blowing fuck...you'll be glad you weren't timid. :biggrin:

Sir, I believe a story is in order. Please start a thread about this.

[stafford]

Cheers guys, especially to Verbolocity for some pretty sound advice. To be honest, over the next few days I'll test the water with some well time gay jokes, then in a few days time, just jump straight in the deep end and ask him straight (hopefully not) up.

Today I was with him for an hour before my mate jumped in and they talked flat out about the girls from "the hills", OC etc for about an hour. (couldnt join in, never watched anything like that) Hardly a natural flow of conversation, my mate was leading it, but only one way to find out if it is just an act.

"Fortune favours the bold", well...here goes!!