I'm straight, but I have an all-consuming crush on a girl... I've only ever seriously liked guys, but does this mean I'm bi/gay? To people who identify as gay, did you always feel that way? Or did you one day develop a same sex crush and not look back? My crush is on my friend, and it's more like an obsession that wouldn't be normal even if it was on a guy. I can't help but wonder if it's a real crush or based on some underlying psychological problem, since obsessive relationships are rarely healthy.
Thanks for any advice/input...
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Hmm.. For me, I think I always knew. I just didn't notice that I liked guys. But, it is possible for anyone to have some kind of same sex attraction in a life time. I don;t know too much about handling crushes or obsessions, but you could always hang out more with her and see how your feeling unrolls into place.
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Hello there,
In life things like this do happen even with the most macho of people... Sexuality comes down to who you wish to be with in the long term such as relationship... Alot of people mistake sexuality as who you have sex with but to be honest if that was the case wouldnt actors who play gay roles in plays or films and have sexual intercourse make them gay??? If you can see yourself being with a girl and furthermore having intervourse with a girl then i would imagen you to be bi sexual... I have admitted to myself im gay because i know in my heart of hearts i can look at a woman and go jesus shes bloody beautiful but i couldnt actually settle with one and play happy families..
Kindest regards
zeon xx
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meeting someone who has qualities and a look that you find attractive whether same sex or opposite is not a problem at all..... obsession is another ball game if it interfere's with your regular routine, and if the person involved decides your over stepping bounderies then it can get ugly i guess...sort of like having a stalker .... if possible then tell this person how u feel and maybe they will accept it or not - but at least it will be out there and off your chest,
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For me, i was in denial because of all the teachings of it being wrong and it just didn't seem feasible to me. I was halfway through college when I realized. For me, I was gay but in denial, but I do think there are various levels... perhaps you're 85 percent preferring guys / 15 percent girls, but this is the first girl that's really made you notice any attraction since your preference for guys was stronger and more accepted. It's hard to say, but I do think it can all depend.
I am glad you mentioned obsession as yet that can be dangerous territory... but the fact that you're rational enough to know that, most likely it's just a strong crush. So... what is it about this girl that makes you so fascinated? Do you fantasize sexually or is it more just being infatuated with the type of girl she is? What is her sexual orientation?
Perhaps this isn't something feasible for you to pursue, but at the very least know that you are not alone; I've definitely heard of other people who thought they were straight until something developed with someone unexpected.
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Searching for a label is useless. And it'll only make u feel down in the long run. Live and be happy.
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