Eh I'm ok with myself being feminine but eh wish I was more masculine sometimes.
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Externally, physically and intellectually I am more male and I am OK with it...on a soul/spirit level I am female and I am OK with it and emotionally I am balanced between the two almost equally...I wouldn't want to change a thing.
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I can honestly say I've never really thought about it... I'm not happy with my body but possibly happy in my own skin.
I've only known one person with issues over his gender, and he described it as feeling like a different person trapped in someone else's body. I could empathise to a degree, as from sources he had shown me there are definite cases where people are mentally sound, capable, and simply unhappy with their physical shape. The body is after all a container for the psyche or soul, however you percieve it.
I would say more masculine if anything. If I can have more of something I'm happy with than all the better.
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I am masculine. My straight friends can verify that. But at the same time, I do not shy and hide away my slightly feminine side. The most obvious feminine side of me is that I am a soft spoken guy. Masculine but soft spoken.
I'm fine carrying each side of token.
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I try to act very masculine and all, or at least be myself, because who I am is pretty masculine, and because in my eyes it breaks all ties with having a female body. But once I become comfortable with my body (I so hope that will happen..) I won't try to hide any feminine traits I may have because then I'd be a slightly flamboyant gay man which is okay. :]
And then, yeah, try seeing whether you have more feminine traits, and if you do..let them out. Be who you wanna be. :]
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I'm not that feminine, but I do have a feminine side. I think it's cool that there are masculine gay guys out there because they prove to tough and possibly homophobic straight guys that not all of us are sissies. I've been in the ballpark of 20 fights in my 26 years (some won, some lost) and I fucking hate it when straight guys undermine the fact that I have seen a lot of what they have seen by speaking to me in a soft, pandering voice that is normally used towards girls. Even some of my closest relatives do this. I mean, I'm not hypermasculine by any means, and I actually hate fighting or any kind of violence, but it's just not cool when you're treated like someone you're not.
On the other hand, have you ever met a gay guy who you knew was gay but acted more masculine than they really were? They weren't code-switching either - they really felt that masculine men were more superior. That kind of pisses me off. I think the really masculine straight guys have it easier than the effeminate ones. Many straight people are more prone to befriending masculine gay guys (or, for that matter, lipstick lesbians) because they fit their narrow view of what acceptable gender roles are. Butch lesbians and camp gay guys are often more likely to be hated on because they seem to be much more different from the norm, and people generally hate that. Many are afraid of the unknown or the unfamiliar.
At the end of the day, the variety in the gay community is a great thing lo long as people accept others for who they are. Sounds like a cliche, I know, but the older I get, the more apparent it is to me that people of all backgrounds, behind their fronts, really believe some fucked up shit.
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I'm "masculine" but I do wish I was better at team sports. hahah....
sorry for supporting the stereotype!!
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[quote=gfxtwin]
On the other hand, have you ever met a gay guy who you knew was gay but acted more masculine than they really were? They weren't code-switching either - they really felt that masculine men were more superior. That kind of pisses me off. I think the really masculine straight guys have it easier than the effeminate ones. Many straight people are more prone to befriending masculine gay guys (or, for that matter, lipstick lesbians) because they fit their narrow view of what acceptable gender roles are. Butch lesbians and camp gay guys are often more likely to be hated on because they seem to be much more different from the norm, and people generally hate that. Many are afraid of the unknown or the unfamiliar.
This is actually super true, and part of that reason is why I wish I came off more masculine. I dated a guy that was more masculine, and straight guys loved him just because of the fact that he acted straight. They were more comfortable with him than me for instance. Granted as time went on they realized yeah just cause I wasn't as masculine didnt make me any less of a person or someone they couldn't like or be friends with. I think when straight guys come across effeminate gay men, they are afraid that they are going to hit on them or make them uncomfortable with their own sexuality. Some people have said that when straight guys see an effeminate man they don't know whether to be friends with them or check them out. Which I have do know of guys checking feminine guys out by mistake which makes them uncomfortable.
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