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11-16-2007, 01:09 PM

Have any of you ever been called a "confirmed batchelor" before ??

It happened to me a while back, and I thought it was a very sweet way of saying "homosexual" or "gay", to be honest with you ...

Technically it's not that accurate these days, as obviously we have increasingly commonplace frameworks within which we can have our partnerships recognised, and thus end our respective batchelorships, but as a term I still think it's kinda cute ...

"He's not gay ........... he's a confirmed batchelor" ... Cool

.

!?!?! Shadow !?!?!

11-17-2007, 05:03 PM

Yikes!

I guess that must be a generational thing. When I hear that I think of all those old "unmarried uncles" at weddings and birthday parties when I was a child that I now know were big closet cases...or maybe not such closet cases but as much as they could back then.

"Oh, uncle Tim is a confirmed batchelor"......yeah right. Confirmed renter of tree number three in the park ;-)

I suppose those kinds of uncles will now be a thing of the past, but I still remember wondering why none of them ever got married.

11-17-2007, 06:14 PM

Michael Wrote:"Oh, uncle Tim is a confirmed batchelor"......yeah right. Confirmed renter of tree number three in the park ;-)

Yeah, isnt this a thing of the past? Now people go out of the closet and the general perception of gay people and couples is kinda different? Plus , now being gay doesnt mean you are a bachelor at least they way i see it.

I dont find it sweet saying 'confirmed bachelor' instead of gay/homosexual but i d rather be introduced like that to my 5 years old nephew... He can grasp that better i think and saves the effort to explain to him what homosexual is. But in other cases i rather be described on my sexuality as gay.

11-17-2007, 06:28 PM

OH nooooooooooooo,

Might be the perfect topic for another debate, but...

Why is it easier for him to understand mommy and daddy or grandma and grandpa, uncle james and aunt alice, than it is uncle spotysocks and his boyfriend? Both of these are sexuality. If they can easily learn one, they can just as easily learn the other, age has nothing to do with it. Well, wuite to the contrary, age has everything to do with it. Just tell them and it will be as normal as anything....Some boys like girls, some boys like boys, and some boys like both. It can't be any easier than that.

Wait years and then you have to break through all kinds of social conditioning when they really do think it's wierd because they have only ever been given one world view. We're not talking sexual positions or acts, they don't get that from heterosexual relationships either....just the plain truth on how the wolrd is put together.

Plus, if you already have gays in the family, you'll probably have more at some time....and it could be him. Save him years of anguish and shame and show him all the aspects of the world around him. If he's not, he'll grow up tolerant of others and their choices.

11-17-2007, 06:56 PM

Good points and i agree with all of them! On the other hand i dont see him often (last time i saw him he was 2) as we live in different countries and the subject 'what uncle is' hasnt come up yet. We are still at the question 'where uncle is' and 'when uncle is coming'.
However since i am not ashamed of my sexuality this would be the only case i would accept to be called a 'confirmed bachelor' if his parents want to explain this to him that way.

11-17-2007, 11:43 PM

My sister and brother hit it head on since we have so many homo's in our family.

I just told them all that I have uncle Fred like Aunt Julie has Uncle Tom. The kids took it as fact and never batted an eye. They have asked questions here and there over the years, but for the most part they think it's kind of cool....I'm kind of the "rebel" uncle in their eyes. The fun one who doesn't pull the status quo.

I have a cousin who is gay and has been with his aprtner for over 30 years...his sister and him are close but she still refers to his partner as his "friend" Dwaine. I was so shocked.....it has totaly messed up the kids and how they see things.

They are of course from Montana.....oooh, scary homo's, don't freak out the kids. The thing is, it scares the parents, not the kids. Learning later they were lied to bothers them though ;-)