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Ruin you wish!!
Granted, you suddenly rememeber that you stabbed yourself in the middle of the butchering frenzy...

Look down, yes, bewteen the live and the panchreas...yes, right in your pierced aorta...there you go..

I wish it would be ok to wear my pickelhaube in public
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Granted, however its the only thing you are allowed to wear..... Wink

I wish people came with owners manuals.
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Granted, but the guarantee policy is worth only for a month and no refunds are allowed..

I wish I wasn't so keyboard-dyslexic...
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Granted - but now all keyboards have shifting keys - meaning they shift around as you type.

I wish my dog would understand that she ain't never going to catch that squirrel.
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You obviously and absolutely do not understand your dog!
Your dog does not want to catch the squirrel.

That woud end all the fun.... Your dog is way too clever to let that happen.
Besides,
Like the dog who chases the car wheel, what the bloddy hell it it going to do with it if it actually caught the damn thing anyway?

Think your dog does not know that?

Think again......

Now that ruins your wish!

Go study duckkies book on pre-basic doggie behaviour from cover to cover for 24H. (It's 3 sentences long, the first, second and third sentences are:-

Your dog is far cleverer than you.

Today is the day I've been looking forward to
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Granted, you are now happier than a witch in a broom factory, because you are one.

I wish I could be in bed RIGHT NOW instead of up waiting for the roommate to finish banging around in the shower.
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Granted you are now in a jail bed after you went all Norman Bates-y when the ex was in the shower

I wish xmas was not IN YOUR FACE-type of Holiday...
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Granted: Now its a 365 year holiday and by law you have to say 'merry christmas' to everyone on penalty of a death sentence.

I wish someone would give me a back rub.
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Granted, an Acacia caven comes to life and will give you that rub

I wish I got off early from work today
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Granted, you got off 1 minutes before you started today.

I wish I had the body of a 24 year old.
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