First let me say that as far as everyone knows, I'm completely straight. But I've become more and more bi-curious over the last couple years. I thought I would just wait for the right situation to come along for me to mess with a guy but it hasnt, and it's driving me crazy. I live in a small town without much selection, so I want to post a craigslist add in the nearest city and get it on.
Questions: How prevalent are craigslist meetups in the gay community? Is it frowned upon at all? It seems like its usually considered the lowest of desperation for straight hookups. I kinda feel like if I'm ever asked about my first gay experience I would be kinda embarrassed to say i met a dude on craigslist, but it seem like the best option for now.
Second, I was kinda wanting to do it tonight, but I've got a couple of pimples in the crotch area. Do you think anyone will care. They're just pink bumps (definitely just pimples), one on the shaft, one above my dick.\
Any advice on posting an add? I want to suggest they we chill and drink a bit before getting to business, so I can get comfortable. Will this be thought of as me being a nuisance? With straight sex there seems to always be making out even with the most casual encounters, but I see that this is different with gays. Would it be weird if I wanted to make out? I mean it seems natural to try kissing a guy before I suck his dick.
Anything that I should try to do/not do to avoid bothering/annoying the partner?
Sorry if any of this is stupid. I feel like I probably come across as less intelligent than I really am.
Much love <3. Thanks for any help.
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lol, first of all I love your name! Suites you, from what I can tell so far.
Umm, personally I'm not fond of craiglist, I don't like it, I don't ever recommend it. However; perhaps other guys here may have done it/ like it and would suggest. But that's just me, my personal preference.
Seems like you're just wanting to get it and done with it, but as I read down, it seems like you really are a compassionate, caring guy, you just don't wanna suck and leave, like others (I call zipper hunters). Though technically you are one, there's a special exception to this, you want to get to know the guy, whether it;s over drinking, or what not, and you also want to make out (I think is absolutely adorable and quite hot!).
Who knows maybe you'll be fond of this guy (I doubt it, if it's craig list) but do you really want a special gay act? Might I suggest get to meet some gay guys first? Hold your boner in tonight, though there are many ways to meet gay guys if there aren't many in your area. Perhaps go to a gay bar? (I don't like suggesting this either, but given your circumstances) Maybe a bar that's nearby in a nearby city? Meet people there?
I highly am against craig - list because what you post online (even if you delete you post after) is there forever. If you do post up on craig list, people are likely going to want to see a pic if there're interested or not before they reply. So it could take some time before you get a potential guy from craig list.
:/
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hello,
When meetingf people from the internet for sex remember its just an agreement between two adults that its a shag and go no friendship business unless of course its able to reach that far... Going for a coffee can be good yet it can also be off putting. Some guys just want to cut the crap and get to the business... One thing i will say if your wanting to try it up the arse make sure ya got plenty of lube and YOU provide the condom... I never trust the other person purely because ive seen a friend become ill from infection and die as a result of a pierced condom..
If you ever feel uneasy about the situation feel free to demand they stop and you can leave... If they ask what your into state vanilla... This is a term used for gentle sex. Explain your not into dominating... Trust me some gay men and dominating comes to whips chains and force as the fantasy goes a step too far. It can be safe if you allow it to be if you enjoy it then go with it but you wont know whether you like something or not until you give it a go... I doubt a guy would worry about pimples and if your worried do it in the dark with the lights OUT... If your suffering from any gum bleeding or cuts in your mouth dont commit oral because any infection the other party may have if any would be passed easily without protection...
If choose to go anal remember to finger with one and some lube then two fingers and then three and then the dick... This helps relax the arse and opens it up for the width of their cock or alternatively if it can fit in your gob it can fit up your arse! It will possibly sting and your go ow ow ow ow ow fucking ell that urts!!!! But try to relax and take it easy once in
Kindest regards and enjoy
zeon x
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Thanks for the thoughts. I've known gay guys in the past who would do craigslist hookups, so i assumed it was pretty normal. I'm not really worried aboutt getting to know the guy and i don't want a relationship or anything, I just want to drink so that I'll feel less awkward.
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Drinking doesnt make you feel less aqward it can reveal a different character altogether... Of course go for one however dont get drunk as you need and MUST be in control of yourself at all times... To be honest why not just go with the flow of things?
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MagicDoors, this is such a personal thing that I don't know how any of us can really and truthfully answer your question.. The real person to ask if it's alright to... will be the partner in question.
Will he accept to kiss and be kissed? I don't know. Will he expect to get right down to business before you get comfortable? I don't know... Will he mind two pimples in your crotch area? I don't know... probably not. Btw is it because you shaved down there, ingrown hair?
Will he want to know your HIV status? I don't know but it might be a good thing to know what it is. You may want to know his, by the way, so you know what you're getting into.
In any case, desperate or not, you really need to know that
1) you must be careful of your own health and safety and therefore accept to meet this person in a public place where you can get away if necessary without harm, and of course wear the right protection (condom) and
2) that you don't have to accept to do anything that is beyond your comfort zone... If you don't wish to suck him, don't. If you don't want to fuck him, don't. If you don't want to be penetrated, don't... Basically it's just self preservation tactics that mustn't be ignored or forgotten.
I really hope your first experience is pleasant and not sleazy. Gay sex can be thoroughly enjoyable if it's done right and with the right person, but again it'll only be as good as what you both bring to the table...
Be safe, have fun, and get back to us about it.
Good luck.
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With regard to Craigslist, I know it may seem sleazy and awkward but consider this: if you are applying on Craigslist to find a potential partner for fun, imagine that there will be other people just like you getting onto it for the same reasons, and they are no sleazier than you, so why not try it if it's your only option for the moment... Just remember that, without being paranoid, it's best to set a meeting place somewhere where you can back out after having had just a coffee if neither he nor you want to pursue the matter any further.
Also, the more honest you are about what you're really looking for (experience in this case but not a relationship), the more likely you are to get what you bargained for... Nobody needs to sift through lies. You're new to this, don't pretend that you aren't. Just admit that you're there to learn.
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zeon Wrote:hello,
When meetingf people from the internet for sex remember its just an agreement between two adults that its a shag and go no friendship business unless of course its able to reach that far... Going for a coffee can be good yet it can also be off putting. Some guys just want to cut the crap and get to the business... One thing i will say if your wanting to try it up the arse make sure ya got plenty of lube and YOU provide the condom... I never trust the other person purely because ive seen a friend become ill from infection and die as a result of a pierced condom..
If you ever feel uneasy about the situation feel free to demand they stop and you can leave... If they ask what your into state vanilla... This is a term used for gentle sex. Explain your not into dominating... Trust me some gay men and dominating comes to whips chains and force as the fantasy goes a step too far. It can be safe if you allow it to be if you enjoy it then go with it but you wont know whether you like something or not until you give it a go... I doubt a guy would worry about pimples and if your worried do it in the dark with the lights OUT... If your suffering from any gum bleeding or cuts in your mouth dont commit oral because any infection the other party may have if any would be passed easily without protection...
If choose to go anal remember to finger with one and some lube then two fingers and then three and then the dick... This helps relax the arse and opens it up for the width of their cock or alternatively if it can fit in your gob it can fit up your arse! It will possibly sting and your go ow ow ow ow ow fucking ell that urts!!!! But try to relax and take it easy once in
Kindest regards and enjoy
zeon x
A bit too graphic??? But yes, lube is necessary and your own condom provision... Agree with Ze on that one.
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WARNING ! For my opinion you are not ready to go further.
It is not just the sex.. maybe - let me be honest - you can handle the sex part.... but then ? Latest after a orgasm you get a break-down. And thats not nice for both of you.
My advice ... don´t hurry ... if you need something fast... take a porn. And learn what you want... how you can handle it.
Why I have this opinion ... OK ... people here know that I´m very open in sexual belongings ... that means... I had a friend... very curious and want to try what he "can" ... we talked a lot about it ... and some day he asked if I would let him try out something. Ok... so I was playing ground :-)... and exactly came what I thought.... he needs more care after this adventure as he thought. From "what I have done"... to "what I´m doing" to "who I am"... and we need a lot of tea that night. He was 28 that time ... so .. not really new in this kind of sports ....
So ... look for a friend who helps you through the first adventure... and I think you will get much less problems as after "sex only"
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avoid craigslist. you might look at the variety of hook up sites and things like grinder.com
have pic with a little clothing first and a nude pic handy. Be honest about your self. Get an idea of what you want the process to entail like but keep in mind the the other person, its a 2way street, make sure he is going your way too. meet at a coffee shop.
magicdoors Wrote:I've got a couple of pimples in the crotch area. Do you think anyone will care. They're just pink bumps (definitely just pimples), one on the shaft, one above my dick Get your self tested, free at a local STD health center in a larger city. They have seen everything and would know better. Also talk to them about the incubation time for the different diseases and how when to get regulatory tested. Your trick should as if you got tested.
avoid craigslist. you might look at the variety of hook up sites and things like grinder.com
have pic with a little clothing first and a nude pic handy. Be honest about your self, some one near your own age. Get an idea of what you want the process to entail like but keep in mind the the other person, its a 2way street, make sure he is going your way too. meet at a coffee shop.
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