So far we have raised 15% of our monthly running costs! Thanks for your generosity!

Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Meeting his mother/Thanksgiving
#1
I just met my now live-in partner's mother, Cathy. We met over dinner at some fancy place. To my relief it worked out and we got along and it seems we have a lot in common too. I wasn't completely surprised because I somehow have the ability to be charismatic and charming with dates's parents. She seemed like a very warm and kind person. He said that afterword she said that she really liked me.

The thing is that now she says I "have to" accompany my boyfriend to Maryland to have Thanksgiving with the family. It seems like the natural thing do do at this point in our relationship. I guess I'll bring my popular recipe for cranberry-orange relish and my favorite pumpkin pie from the "Birdbath Bakery" at City bakery.

However I"m a little worried if they'll accept me because they're an upper-middle class family in a fancy suburb of Baltimore and I'm just a working class son of immigrants.
Do you guys think it will work out?
#2
Be natural, be yourself and remember, your partner chose you, you chose him and the family has welcomed you. You have all the class you need to be part of the family so relax and have a nice thanksgiving with the family Wink
#3
Yes it will work out. Relax and who cares about classes.........that shouldn't be relevant. You go along and enjoy it all. Let them see how nice you are.
Just be yourself and don't feel inferior because of this class bullshit............ you are just as good as the next person............
Enjoy it all and have a good time
All the best.........
#4
Relax, that relish is my "got 'em" trick for in laws too Smile It goes back generations in my family, likely yours too so, get talking about that, the good things like hard working, making it through the depression and such that your ancestors did. That will get them on their own stories and, form there, it's all good Smile

Just be you and, enjoy your self. I'm sure their son has told them plenty already. You'll be fine.
#5
If you weren't worthy of acceptance your partner wouldn't truly love and accept you either. After all, the apple never rolls too far from the tree (generally speaking). So I say have a blast enjoying getting a peek into your lover's past from first hand!! What a treat. Be prepared to keep your own emotions and expectations in check. You have a wonderful heritage that is not defined by material worth, so do they.
You idea to keep it simple can only be improved by a commitment to "relax on purpose." Start practicing that NOW and be in the moment you are in instead of in a thought or feeling about the past or future! This practice will serve you well when you face the natural anxiety of the visit. Your effort will pay off in letting yourself enjoy the company and the chance to learn and grow with your mate! I wish I could go! B)
Heart  Life's too short to miss an opportunity to show your love and affection!  Heart
#6
Everything will be fine. Your boyfriend is the one you are in love with and he obviously accepts you no matter who you are or where you are from. He wants you to know, and so does his mother, that you are a part of the family now. Stop doubting who you are and just go with the flow. You stressing over the matter will just build up inside of you and that is what will tear something down. Just chill and enjoy life. Smile
#7
Person66 Wrote:However I"m a little worried if they'll accept me because they're an upper-middle class family in a fancy suburb of Baltimore and I'm just a working class son of immigrants. Do you guys think it will work out?

it will work out because your super cool.

-you husband might ignore you at times, put a few movies in the portable you will bring with you. hard copy book?
-you dont have to be your husbands constant companion, find some time to be with your self.
-find a gym in the area, find things YOU want to do.
-gays dont catch, so if you dont, dont watch the games, have a plan.
-keep things simple.
-consider leaving a thank you note, small gift.
#8
Thank you all for your support.
I guess I just felt insecure because of past problems.
My family has always lived in NYC, when I was 4 my family moved me and my younger brother out to a posh, upper-class New Jersey suburb (I still don't know how they afforded a house there). Thinking it would be "better for the kids". The 4 years we lived their were horrible. They did not accept us. My mother was not allowed to join the PTA (it was run like an exclusive club), the kids made fun of me because my father was a taxi-driver. They said you weren't a "real American" unless you had lived in America for five generations on both maternal and paternal sides (another variation said that both grandparents had to be American-born).
In short it was miserable and we left and returned to New York City.

I realize now that this thing with my boyfriend is completely different. They have accepted me for who I am and seem to genuinely want me to join them. His mother was very sweet and there's no reason I shouldn't look forward to going.
Thank you all so much. Confusedmile:


Possibly Related Threads…
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  Meeting people after college livingproof 9 803 03-07-2015, 11:26 AM
Last Post: Virge
  Issues with my BF's mother... Adam 15 1,033 06-24-2014, 10:08 PM
Last Post: Anocxu
  Advice- Relationship interest will not talk to me on Thanksgiving Arkansota 11 559 11-30-2013, 02:11 AM
Last Post: Dan1980
  How to handle meeting a shy, closeted gay boy? antigrandbean 11 6,068 08-29-2013, 03:44 AM
Last Post: justbry87
  first meeting? bakalove 8 571 01-19-2013, 04:07 PM
Last Post: stpdo2

Forum Jump:


Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)