Straight man confessions

[unknownfacts]

I am straight married men. Few years back (4 years) i got a nice blow job from a AdultStore. I was happy and really like it. from the day on wards. I started like to get blowjobs. I am trying to avoid those feelings. Craigslist was helping me to find some connections.  currently i am always thinking for gay porn and gay things. I am thinking , i am addicted to gay during the day time. because of this i am not able success in work. I am deviate from work.  I am more sex appetite for sex nowadays.
I am in 40's. I want to come out of  these things.