is he cheating on me???

[ChadCoxRox]

Ok, i'm not themost confident of guys. I constantly suspect ...cheating...he also said...i am an insecure and untrusting guy...i want advice on this...feel free to bash me and my sneaking around...tell me what u think of the whole situation.

Hi Lazy! Welcome to GS
If it were not this guy it would be any other right? The insecurity exists whether you are with a trustworthy person or not. Of course it would be easier for you knowing you happen to be with a trustworthy person because you'd be able to let your guard down and rest; however, the insecurity would remain and rear it's painful head in other areas and maybe when you least expect it. Working through this stuff is a common effort in the art and science of maturing and growing up, regardless of age.

I hope you will look into the subject. There is a huge library of resources out there on the matter and the more you equip your self...well...knowledge is power friend. YOU are worth it and any potential partner will benefit as well. Your sensitivities might be harnessed, understood and channeled into something productive instead of destructive.

BTW, his argument that he suspected it was you is just as likely as not. Either way, his knowing the dynamic puts you at a distinctive disadvantage in the interpersonal interactions unless you take total ownership and control of your own internal struggles with trust. I am afraid of getting hurt and even though I've been hurt before and have learned that I will live through it and can grow from it, I'm still gun shy and suspicious. I learned how to do "getting hurt" from my mom and it has been a very long journey learning how to unlearn that training. So I know it is difficult.

Best wishes as you start working on it and I hope you'll be around here so we can grow together!