Really unhappy...like someone that i should not like

[hank]

Thanks. I know I want get anything out of it. Thats why i want to get over him as soon as possible, so that i can treat him completely as a friend. Will you tell me how you proceeded to be friends with that girl?

So nobody that lives with you knows your gay? The only people that talk to you about it is us?

Really the reason i lived this girl isn't because she is a beauty queen, she was convenient, i had never had a real friend of the opposite sex before. She was quite tomboyish and very sweet. I started wanting her because she knew me and accepted me she liked me very much the same way I liked her. Up to that point i had only ever had sexual thoughts toward male people.

But like any flame it will burn out. It just wasn't possible. It hurt for some time, seeing her meant secret pain only short lived. And a current friendship that is very valuable to me.