dont exactly know what to do here

[Bowyn Aerrow]

see i guess my biggest problem is that after my time in the Marines and then 2 years in a straight relationship i dont know how to be myself anymore. i had to hide it for 4 years in the Marines and just continued doing so after that. i guess coming out isnt the problem its just not hiding it that i need to worry about.

Worry about it? Why?

Ask yourself - Why is it important to me to come out and be 'out'?

I have to wonder if you are not trying to be something or someone you are not by having a definite 'out' date and doing definite 'gay' things in order to feel that you are 'gay'.

Do you date? Do you go to gay clubs and do 'gay things' to meet other gay men for friends, potential relationships, etc? If not, it may be time to invest some time in something 'gay' to get you a set of gay friends.

No pressure to have sex here, but do get some people in your life that will take you clubbing or take you to the gay book store (not just the head shop) and other 'gay scene' related type stuff.

Forcing yourself to 'be gay' whatever that means, isn't important. What is important is that you have exposure to the 'gay scene' to re-find your inner gay.