Straight wife seeking advice

[calicandy70]

I just wanted to thank you all so much for your kind words and input. I finally confronted him. At first he started to deny it, but with all the proof i had, he finally caved in. He swore to me up and down that he didn't actually meet anyone. I told him that out of respect as the mother of his children, he needs to tell me if I need to get tested ( I am getting tested regardless and have an appt. on Monday) he swears to me "no"...he never acted on it. He told me he was at work and since he had to work through the night he was using cocaine and then started looking at Craigslist and answered a few ads. He said he wasn't in his right mind and swore he never acted on anything. He says he is not bisexual, or gay and that he was just curious and doing it for fun and that it was harmless. He said he feels horrible. I told him I can't look him right now, that he needs help with his drug use and that I wasn't sure what to do and left it at that. I confided in a friend who went through something similar a few years ago. She gave me her attorney's number and seems to think that since my husband makes a good size income, if we divorce I should be able to remain a stay at home mom a little longer or at least until the dust settles which is what she did.. and even still right now she is just holding a part time job..and she only has 1 child. (a sigh of relief on my part!). I plan on calling the attorney tomorrow to see what my options are but am not going to say anything to my husband until I have a plan in place. I HAVE been asking all the wrong questions, it really doesn't matter if he's gay, bi or whatever ..I need to figure out if this is the way I want to keep living my life..and I just can't do this anymore. And it's not just the lying, it's the drug and alcohol use. It's emotionally exhausting. I just hope he can clean up for the sake of our kids. Thank you all again...you all have been so kind and I appreciate your advice.