This puppy needs help (Very Long)

[PurpleHusky]

..............

[dfiant]

While I think it's time to embrace online dating, I find it hard to understand how someone can develop feelings for another from merely interacting on the internet. I think there must be some real world interaction before feelings develop, you can't know a person from internet, it's just too easy to be something you aren't from behind a computer. True, a good indicator but nothing is better then sitting down opposite a real person in a cafe or pub and having a chat is where feelings should begin developing.

The first guy that isn't revealing his relationship is hiding something, the sense I get is he is in a straight relationship and is experimenting with his sexuality.

Chris you have only known for 3 weeks and only from the internet, how real are the feelings.

Come on, you are falling for text on a LCD computer screen....I'm just saying.

[Nick9]

Hi, I think dfiant said it all.

The only thing that bothers me is your feeling about Chris. He opened up to you and you are backing off. This is just sad. Try to treat him the way you would like to be treated by others. You don't need to make him your bf, but if he trusts you and needs help, you shouldn't cowardly disappear. You may be the first and only person he felt comfortable sharing his problems with.

[Rainbowmum]

Sweetie there is no magic way to switch off your feeling, it will take time.
As for Chris , ask yourself Is it really fair to him if you continue to pine for another?
Take some time away from both of them , so you can focus on healing and then moving on.

[Nick9]

Maybe I get it wrong, but reading different posts here (not only yours) I was wondering... Is it really always everything or nothing? So many people seem to look for a boyfriend so hard, that they don't take friendship as something that counts. I admit I don't get this trend.

[azulai]

I'm not familiar with the furries culture, so I may have no business responding to you. mile:

At the heart of what you are both doing is role-playing. I guess I would start there in examining your feelings and trying to put them in perspective. You are enamored with Sen, someone who admits in your texting exchange that he has "a hard time with ...[his] feelings,"so I think that is a red-flag for YOU. You just may be enamored with the role he likes to play and know nothing of his true self. Maybe spend some time reflecting as objectively as you can on past communications you have had with Sen and see if there was anything truly illuminating about his personal life. How much has he really let you in?

I think dfiant makes a wise-call that Sen is probably in a straight relationship.

For me, a person's eyes are the window to their soul and heart so without that way of "reading" someone, I would be very cautious about what I would let my heart "feel" without a face-to-face meeting.

If this emotional attachment to other players is a recurring pattern for you, I would use it as something to be aware of in future rping relationships.

I think Nick9 makes a very good observation about friendships. Some guys are only "looking" for a bf and have no time or interest in developing actual friendships, to talk about something other than that they are horny or they want a bf. How many posts do we read here about someone who has fallen for their straight friend? I just wonder sometimes, as well, what does friendship really mean to these persons? I just think you have to have other goals in life and you need a wide variety of people in your life to enrich, enlighten and challenge you as a person. I think it's important to also realize that if you want a bf who is "everything" in your life, you are setting yourself, your future partner and the relationship up for failure. Maybe spend a little time reflecting on what you are seeking in these relationships?

As far as Chris, only you know the personal details of what he told you and how they relate to your comfort zone. But, you need to be honest with him because, look how you are feeling right now about Sen, and your emotional pain; so use that knowledge to deal as kindly as you can with Chris.

I'll be very honest with you, the first person I opened up to about my suicide attempt was someone I had a crush on. The person basically didn't respond at all and it really effected me for a time there and just compounded my shame. So please, I can't stress enough, use what you are feeling now to help you deal with Chris in an honest yet kind manner.

[Nick9]

I'll be very honest with you, the first person I opened up to about my suicide attempt was someone I had a crush on. The person basically didn't respond at all and it really effected me for a time there and just compounded my shame. So please, I can't stress enough, use what you are feeling now to help you deal with Chris in an honest yet kind manner.

This is almost the same what happened to me... All I got was silence. It was awfull and I can't forget it. Please don't do that. Picture yourself on Chris' spot and try to help.