East Wrote:We all have a degree of internalized homophobia...acknowledging it....putting it on the table and examining it.... is the best course of action if you want to diminish it. You can't address a problem if you do not acknowledge that it exists.
As for the PDA...your fear is real so you have to weigh the benefit versus the cost. It isnt easy ...and there are no easy answers.
And to add.
As a person who is outwardly feminine and in a country where being gay is a huge no-no (well, it's actually getting better as time goes on), you shouldn't feel ashamed. Self-internalized Homophobia or not, you should never feel ashamed of yourself, because you're the only you you've got, so love it.
I get called names all the time and weird looks and w/e, but I never once feel ashamed of myself, because that's not what life is about. Life is literally about living and more importantly, living the way that makes you happy.
Perhaps you should be more discreet and take what East said into account about the PDA, but you shouldn't feel ashamed, no matter your choice.
A black man can walk down the street now without being called a N word or assaulted because of his colour and women can walk the streets in their Armani suits and not be called Lesbians or other discriminatory words. It's not the 1800's-1900's, times have changed.
It's like being a victim, actually it is, but as with all victims, you have to remember that it's not your fault. Don't put shame on yourself, especially for things outside of your control, put the shame on the victimizer.
Whatever choices you make, will ultimately lay the foundation for the life you want to live.-Alex, Noah's Arc.
Hope all goes well for you
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
