blacked out night with bi friend question

[LateBloomer]

Yeah, if he fucked you in the ass you would have felt it the next morning.

Did you feel sore? If not, you weren't fucked.

Does that help you?

[Spades]

7.5 - 8"? I think you'd have felt it the next day

And I think what's bothering you more is being lied to, being deceived and being the subject of your "friend's" game. So my advice, cut him out of your life and move on. Don't let what might have happened define you or put doubts in your mind as to who you are.

Also, quit the weed

[East]

I can empathize with you...on two different occasions...before I knew what a roofie was...I got raped (actually...I dont' know what happened as I was out of it but I do know I was in their f*cking bed...grrrrrr) ...these guys put something in my drink. It is a horrible feeling not knowing what happened. Both of these incidents happened over 25 years ago yet they still bother me to this day occasionally...

The fact that he took pictures is more disturbing to me than any of the rest of it because he knew what he was doing....the guy raped you and he wanted a souvenir. Sex exists between CONSENTING ADULT HUMANS...you were NOT consenting so it wasn't sex...it was rape. It is bothering you because you were violated.

It has nothing to do with any possible feelings you may or may not have so please stop beating yourself up about it. Can you imagine how absurd it would be for a man to do this to a woman and then tell them that they liked it or that they were straight so it was "OK" as though one's sexuality has anything to do with it. It wouldn't matter if you were straight or gay or anything in between...you were violated...period.

I am very sorry this happened to you....maybe if you call it what it is that might help. Please dont' ask him about it anymore....people who do this get off on power and control and he might enjoy playing with your mind.

[Nick9]

I don't mind that he sucked me, its not a big deal. I just know for a fact that I was blacked out after (by the pictures) and I'd hate to be taken advantage of, you know like anal penetration and stuff.. and all the lies he told me before triggered those thoughts. Do you think I would have felt it?

I don't want to come off as a homo-phobe.. its just that I don't have the balls to be the one doing the sucking or getting fucked or any of that. I don't know if its the way I look or the way I carry myself, its just not me. Especially not with him, I mean yea of course I think some guys are attractive.. but females take precedence. I don't think its enough to label me bi because I simply don't have the urge to do something sexual with a man unless its with Johnny Depp or something? lol I think any straight guy thinks that deep down but they don't say it. I still would be reluctant to be getting did by him though..

Hi, being gay or bi is nothing bad, so you don't need to apologize or explain. Nobody should 'label' you, you should be who you feel you are and do what makes you feel comfortable. So even if it is not Johnny, but your classmate and you dream about him every night it's okay. Even asking him is okay. So, if this happen in the future and you feel like it, don't beat yourself.

But I think you are giving mixed signals to your 'friend.' He may really like you or he may be an asshole, probably both. But you keep coming back to him, keep talking about it... He is playing with you now and he enjoys it. But you too play according his rules. You are giving him this power over you.

One thing that I absolutely don't get, is the xanax. You must have known that you would not be yourself. And with this in your mind you went to visit someone? Stay away from this, because if you don't, it may very well happen again in the future.

And no, I don't think he 'did it.' But now he enjoys hurting you. Stay away from him. I would think about some gentle way how to break up this strange friendship, so that he would not send those pictures to everyone in school.