mrk2010 Wrote:See I think thisis where you have to be careful. I go to the gym 5-6 times a week and on top of that if I can be bothered run. I say if anyone wants to go to the gym a lot good on them, I'd rather be doing that than sit on my arse all day and be lazy lol and as for not having a brain, don't judge a book by its cover, you might find that these people are highly qualified or might be in a better field of work than yourself lol
I want to echo a bit what mrk is saying here.
As I struggled with self-acceptance, I directed all my anger and hatred at myself. It took a while to figure out what I was doing, how to love myself, how to accept myself and break free of the self destruction.
Actually, running and cycling played a large part of freeing me from my battle. Challenging myself through exercise became the best thing for me. I put a lot of my energy into only doing good things to my body.
I do have an acquaintance who was bullied and always the smallest guy in high school. He has built himself up because he struggles with self-image and that fear of being defenseless.
While I don't pump iron, I am not about to criticize those that do. Maybe some of us are overcoming demons, and we've traded addictions? Maybe it's not purely for aesthetic reasons, but someone's way to cope? Maybe it's something some of us have stumbled upon that we cling to rather than drugs, cigarettes, alcohol, self-harm or suicide?
eta: As far as a dating culture:
My bf and I run together three times a week. It's one of our common interests that we share and a set date for us. We are both very active guys. Our areas of study are pretty demanding with HOURS indoors so we both share a need to be outdoors. We also support each other in our diets. We don't eat any junk food.
I knew before I started dating anyone that I couldn't date someone who expected me to watch a movie on the couch every Friday night. If any of you wants to judge me feel free, but I knew what my needs were and one of them was an active partner. (That doesn't mean I don't like to snuggle!)
There was this post one time here about dating and I was suggesting picnics and bike rides and someone else posted not to do such things because these activities would cause one to SWEAT!
That always struck me as hilarious! My bf and I have biked and played basketball for dates. We get home and we smell ripe.
I guess I see nothing wrong with "muscle" guys wanting to date other guys that understand and respect their commitment.
Peace.