Not sure what to think of my behavior.. Need some help

[Rutstuck]

I have very low self esteem and I do care what people think of me.. I remember being in the eighth grade and this girl told me she thought I was gay and I remember saying really? You think so?? But at that time I didn't really think about it like that because I was into girls ./ speed up to my deadly twenties and now I've come to realize that I get turned on by gay porn and straight porn but the gay porn tends to turn me on a bit more but when I see their faces I don't find them beautiful I don't see beauty like I do with seeing women.. I've never looked at a man and said wow Hes cute or Gorgeous..I've done that with women though...

Also I discovered that I'm able to have sex with men too and women .. I've had sex with a few men but I've had sex with more women and some of those times were amazing! There was a couple if times though were I couldn't get it up and I'm not sure if it was because I was drinking or if their was a deeper meaning to this.. Also I've noticed that when it comes to sexual thoughts I can get an erection immediately when thinking of some kind of a fantasized gay encounter but when it comes to women thoughts it doesn't really go up it's just sort of hard soft.. Just the other day I was talking to some older women and I imagined having sex with them and felt my peanis Start to get hard there's more of those situations too .. And I also now I want to be in a relationship with a women because I just don't want to be romantic with men... So I'm not sure where's this leaves me and not sure what to think about myself..

[myapple]

Lol well stop caring what people think of you. You'll spend your life living up to someone else's opinion of you. Have a mind of your own. Don't worry about what "label" you fit into. That's a majority of the people who come here for advice's problem. Just be yourself and have sex with you whoever you want to have sex with.

[pellaz]

gay or straight porn is choreographed to appeal to everyone and sell. Not a good indicator.
Start from this thought: your gay if you can carry on a successful relationship with a same sex partner.

[Sylph]

Lol well stop caring what people think of you. You'll spend your life living up to someone else's opinion of you. Have a mind of your own. Don't worry about what "label" you fit into. That's a majority of the people who come here for advice's problem. Just be yourself and have sex with you whoever you want to have sex with.

Agree.

I don't think I've cared what people thought of me... I don't like being watched overtly, but I generally don't care if someone thinks I'm a huge Fag... cause I am .

Don't let the constrictions and idealisms of society limit your self-expression, whether it be sexual, platonic or whatever. Society has put into your brain, that what you're feeling is not "normal" and I think you just need not listen to that mile: .

I personally know I wouldn't be happy with a girl romantically/sexually, so I know I'm attracted to men[cause they are so hot... lol]. But don't let limitations hold you back from what you want, especially because it's what you think is right or wrong based on your understanding of society and it's rights and wrongs.

Just let go. Don't worry so much what people think/will think. Do what you feel is right, not because society says so, but because it's what you want and like mile: .

[Puck]

Who cares what some pathetic busybody thinks of you? If you're happy with yourself, what does it matter what a complete stranger thinks? They're nobody!

Be content with the way you were born, know that you're just as interesting and unique as the next person to cross your path...people will respond to that newfound confidence in a positive light.

Best of luck to you! Hold your head high and believe in your worthiness mile:

[Rainbowmum]

Hello Rutstuck.

Each and everyone of us is different in many ways , that being said it is not always easy to fit in with societies expectation.
You cannot fit a square peg in a round hole.

Solution.
Do not try to live up to anyone's expectations , be 100% honest with yourself and flip off the rest.
If you stay true to yourself you can't go wrong.

The very worst and most difficult battle you will ever fight is against yourself.
The more you empower others with their perception of you , the further you are burying your true self.

Good luck.

[Dan1980]

Hi don't worry what other people think. Live you life as you want to. As Rainbowmun said we are all different. If we were all the same it will be a boring world. All the best. mile:

[Rutstuck]

I do agree that I shouldn't be holding back and I'm usually afraid of not being able to fit in socially and it's not so much about people thinking I'm gay because if they put a women i thought was attractive I would prove to them that I can bone her.. But it's more about my lack of social skills and I've had some bad experiences where I failed and I haven't been able to get over them so i have it stuck in my head that I won't be able to meet people without embarrassing myself insome way.. I almost feel like Paul Rudd in I love you man when he over hears his fiancee and her freinds talking about how he has no freinds then he says .. I gotta get sone fucking freinds!.. I've actually thought that could be me when I get back in avrelationship then I worry what if her freinds think I'm weird socially.. My mind is a fucking mess..):

[Rutstuck]

One of you said this.....Start from this thought: your gay if you can carry on a successful relationship with a same sex partner...... I honestly can't see myself in a relationship with a man.. So that doesnt make me gay ?? What about how I can get quicker erections with homosexual thoughts over straight ones?.. Usually..

[TomStatic]

ah sure find a man and woman to be happy with togther
3 wouldnt be a crowd for u